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Medicine and Healthcare - [Australia Awards] How did you choose your proposed course and institution



mipsydibbles 1 / -  
Aug 10, 2021   #1

pursuing a Master's degree in Public Health



The extensive field of medicine allows healthcare professionals to choose their career paths according to their interests. As a medical school graduate, my experiences in engaging with society in the field of sexual and reproductive health through XXX (XXXX), intrigued me to broaden my knowledge about community medicine, specifically public health. Thereupon, I propose to pursue a Master's degree in Public Health at the University of Melbourne or the University of Queensland.

The University of Melbourne is ranked 16th globally and 1st nationally for Public Health Master Program. Compared to other Universities, the University of Melbourne offers a wider range of subjects for students to specialize in, one I am particularly keen to explore is Gender and Women's Health. The program is the only one that offers capstone subjects, where students will be able to conduct local to international projects in the fields of public health. I intend to utilize the opportunity to imply the knowledge obtained. Since the XXX government is still putting the health of its women behind, shown by the rising number of child marriages and unintended pregnancies, I believe through apprehending and completing the capstone courses related to the mentioned subject will be a stepping stone for me to advance my career thus creating more effective and creative approaches to professionally prioritize the issue.

Ranked 2nd in Australia for the Master of Public Health Program is the University of Queensland, which came last on my priority list. Similar to the University of Melbourne, the program also gives their final semester students an opportunity to work in organizations related to public health. Both programs offer comprehensive course plans which support my intentions to intercede the left off health problem in my country that is women's health.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15461  
Aug 11, 2021   #2
Remove the ranking references of the universities. Do not indicate a first or second choice either. The applicant must appear honored to be accepted into either university. Right now, the applicant honors one university and insults the other in the eyes of the Australian reviewer. He could be removed from consideration for making such insulting / hurtful statements. It would be better to explain the choice based on 2 relevant aspects:

- The relationship of the applicant's undergraduate course to each chosen masters course. Offering direct subjects studied in connection with the course will be helpful.

- Work exposure that reveals a hands-on experience or focus for each course option.

Combining these 2 for each course will depict a professional and academic familiarity to the course requirements without having to go into details that would make the response go over the 200 word maximum.


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