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(the abundance of options available) + (sports medicine specialist) Boston - Interest



lk0124 3 / 2  
Dec 31, 2010   #1
Short Essay: In five or six sentences, tell us how you first became interested in BU and what steps you have taken to learn more about us.

When an admission officer visited my school in grade 10, my attention was immediately drawn to BU and the abundance of options available. I was immediately attracted to the programs in the Medical and Physical Therapy Field because they seemed to fit exactly what I wanted to do. The following year, I had the opportunity of interacting with another admissions officer when they visited and I was able to ask questions. There has been something about BU that has really attracted me and before making my decision to apply the only thing left was to visit the school. In August 2010, I visited the school and met with faculty at Sargeant College and spoke to students there to get their perspectives. Visiting the school made me really see that BU was the perfect place for me.

Essay: Given what you know about Boston University, what do you hope to accomplish as an undergraduate here? Please respond in an essay of no more than 500 words.

Ten years from now, I see myself as a sports medicine specialist. My journey will begin at Sargeant College on September 1st, 2011 when I join the freshman class of 2015. The first step on this exciting path will be an Undergraduate Program at Sargeant with a concentration in Physiology. Through this program, I will gain a deeper understanding of how the body works. In addition, I anticipate gaining hands on experience working with the high caliber athletes at Boston University. For my career goals I see Boston University as the best place to be because of what Sargeant College has to offer and the fact that Boston University has some of the best athletes to work with. With many of the world's leading research facilities located in close proximity to BU, I see the potential for collaborative work. As an undergraduate at Boston University, I intend to contribute to the faculty by doing sports medicine research. I intend to focus on risk prevention and the role of performance analysis as I feel that more often than not, injuries can be prevented. Although education will be a significant part of my experience at Boston University, I will be involved with intramural sports and participate in some of the many clubs offered. By pursuing an undergraduate degree through the college of rehabilitation science, I will be taking steps towards my goal - a career in sports medicine. I am certain that Boston University will provide me an excellent education to pursue my passion and to be successful in my field of choice. Although I hope to continue doing research, I hope to one day be one of the team doctors for the Terriers.

EF_Kevin 8 / 13052  
Jan 28, 2011   #2
You write very well. This essay is lacking substance a little bit, but not too much... it will be great if you talk a little more about your specific interests in the field. This stuff I quoted above, though well written, is sort of vague.

I tend to think this sort of approach is sometimes weak because of a divided focus... are you interested in the sport or the medicine? I think it actually weakens the essay when you say you want to be one of the team doctors, because that makes it seem like you might not be actually interested in medicine as much as you are interested in the team.

I know that seems like a completely ignorant thing for me to say, because this is about sports medicine... but I want to tell you I think it will benefit you to focus more on the medicine and less on the sport.

:-)


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