I really look forward to any comments and advice as always!!
This section is an opportunity for you to elaborate on the information you have provided earlier. You may discuss a special talent, a personal experience or an activity that you have been involved in that is relevant to the course you are applying for admission.
[...]
After review:
My love for Business and Economics took roots in the create-your-business "Civilization". The program allows high school students interested in economics to create their own business model and attempt to make it work. I took part in it three times in 2012, 2013 and 2014. Over the course of the year the participants meet once a week to to discuss and learn about the theory of Economics, Management and Finances, which are not, unfortunately, offered in Russia at the school level. In June, the practical part of the course is held in a hotel near Moscow. There, participants bring to life the projects they created during the year, compete on the market, unite into monopolies, bankrupt, start over again etc.
Three years ago this gave me the first taste of the way Business works and planted admiration for it. Learning to cooperate effectively, demonstrating initiative, taking risk, making on-the-spot decisions and accepting responsibility, solving challenging problems along the way inspired me to look into the rules of Economy in-depth. I was fascinated by the feeling of thrill when I was able to predict other participant's actions and the impact it was going to have on my current project. This consequently allowed to adopt my market polices accordingly and ultimately achieve my goals. The summer of 2014, was a culmination. The fight for success was ever so tense. After the previous year's many fruitless attempts, I felt proud to walk away with the highest prize for creating a uniquely sustainable business model.
Before I came across the Civilization I was not sure what path to choose in life. Studying Russian, English, Japanese, French and Spanish, among which only the last one I do not speak fluently yet, I was looking for a unique sphere. I struggled for opportunities to not only apply my knowledge for pure translation of other people's thoughts but as a tool for mutual understanding between colleges, partners and coworkers that could serve to broaden the horizon of my mind.
[b]I actually have a question for you. Could I post in this topic another essay I really need comments for because I don't feel like starting a new thread: it becomes acceedingly difficult to navigate through them. Plus, it would be nice not to draw too much attention to it.
This section is an opportunity for you to elaborate on the information you have provided earlier. You may discuss a special talent, a personal experience or an activity that you have been involved in that is relevant to the course you are applying for admission.
[...]
After review:
My love for Business and Economics took roots in the create-your-business "Civilization". The program allows high school students interested in economics to create their own business model and attempt to make it work. I took part in it three times in 2012, 2013 and 2014. Over the course of the year the participants meet once a week to to discuss and learn about the theory of Economics, Management and Finances, which are not, unfortunately, offered in Russia at the school level. In June, the practical part of the course is held in a hotel near Moscow. There, participants bring to life the projects they created during the year, compete on the market, unite into monopolies, bankrupt, start over again etc.
Three years ago this gave me the first taste of the way Business works and planted admiration for it. Learning to cooperate effectively, demonstrating initiative, taking risk, making on-the-spot decisions and accepting responsibility, solving challenging problems along the way inspired me to look into the rules of Economy in-depth. I was fascinated by the feeling of thrill when I was able to predict other participant's actions and the impact it was going to have on my current project. This consequently allowed to adopt my market polices accordingly and ultimately achieve my goals. The summer of 2014, was a culmination. The fight for success was ever so tense. After the previous year's many fruitless attempts, I felt proud to walk away with the highest prize for creating a uniquely sustainable business model.
Before I came across the Civilization I was not sure what path to choose in life. Studying Russian, English, Japanese, French and Spanish, among which only the last one I do not speak fluently yet, I was looking for a unique sphere. I struggled for opportunities to not only apply my knowledge for pure translation of other people's thoughts but as a tool for mutual understanding between colleges, partners and coworkers that could serve to broaden the horizon of my mind.
[b]I actually have a question for you. Could I post in this topic another essay I really need comments for because I don't feel like starting a new thread: it becomes acceedingly difficult to navigate through them. Plus, it would be nice not to draw too much attention to it.