Please give me your thoughts on this, is it too descriptive? any grammar mistakes or punctuation?
What attribute of your personality are you most proud of, and how has it impacted your life so far? This could be your creativity, effective leadership, sense of humor, integrity, or anything else you'd like to tell us about. (*) (200-250 words)
My adventurous side is something I am in awe to, it has boosted up my lifestyle, making me less afraid to try new things and challenge myself in vast areas.
Forcing myself to step out of my comfort zone, I marched on a path of self exploration, attending international and national science camps in a vast diversity of fields ranging form biomedical engineering to astronomy, working almost independently the research projects were supervised by mentors, both challenging and demanding, these endeavors made my interest in astronomy photography and computing prosper and opened my mind to the endless things I can do in my life, teaching me that being a geek meant adding to your personal colors and uniqueness.
This in return made me more confident of my decisions and managing risk taking more wisely, that could be shown in the fact that I decided to stray from the similar annual electronics projects in my high school despite my teacher's discouragement and build a magnetic levitation device, and it worked perfectly.
Being adventurous made me step out of conventionality occasionally making me more independent and mature and my life less mundane, I started taking Oud lessons despite my lack of musical history, volunteering as a clown doctor learning to make balloon animals and magic tricks not to forget taking Spanish lessons.
I am not afraid to err or fail nor venture on my own it has become something integral in my life, leading me to the position of applying at MIT.
What attribute of your personality are you most proud of, and how has it impacted your life so far? This could be your creativity, effective leadership, sense of humor, integrity, or anything else you'd like to tell us about. (*) (200-250 words)
My adventurous side is something I am in awe to, it has boosted up my lifestyle, making me less afraid to try new things and challenge myself in vast areas.
Forcing myself to step out of my comfort zone, I marched on a path of self exploration, attending international and national science camps in a vast diversity of fields ranging form biomedical engineering to astronomy, working almost independently the research projects were supervised by mentors, both challenging and demanding, these endeavors made my interest in astronomy photography and computing prosper and opened my mind to the endless things I can do in my life, teaching me that being a geek meant adding to your personal colors and uniqueness.
This in return made me more confident of my decisions and managing risk taking more wisely, that could be shown in the fact that I decided to stray from the similar annual electronics projects in my high school despite my teacher's discouragement and build a magnetic levitation device, and it worked perfectly.
Being adventurous made me step out of conventionality occasionally making me more independent and mature and my life less mundane, I started taking Oud lessons despite my lack of musical history, volunteering as a clown doctor learning to make balloon animals and magic tricks not to forget taking Spanish lessons.
I am not afraid to err or fail nor venture on my own it has become something integral in my life, leading me to the position of applying at MIT.