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'We argue all the time' - : PERSON WHO HAS MADE AN IMPACT ON YOUR LIFE



rjeanes17 1 / -  
Jan 4, 2013   #1
Topic: Write an essay in which you tell us about someone who has made an impact on your life and explain how and why this person is important to you.

I didn't have a lot to write about for this so I think my essay might be on the short side, any pointers you can give will be appreciated, thank you. (And now that I see it on here instead of Word I know it's too short, so any help on how I can make it longer will especially be appreciated)

Essay:
I am not a social person, I barely talk around people that I'm not friends with, I talk even less around people I don't know. This of course makes making friends rather difficult, so I've spent quite some time friendless before. During this time characters became my friends, characters in TV programs or video games, places I could return anytime I need a distraction. If I was sad, or more often just apathetic, I would watch reruns of Scrubs or 30 Rock; if I needed something more intellectually stimulating than a sitcom I would watch House or Bones; and with my family I would watch more story heavy, less procedural dramas like Firefly or Battlestar. The characters in these shows helped me develop my sense of humor, a lot of my vocab comes from them, even my moral character developed from questions raised during their moral dilemmas.

Now that I actually have friends they have a greater impact as real people than TV characters, but their effect is similar. Having lost my brother at a young age, my best friend is like my surrogate brother, and kind of my taller, less attractive clone. We argue all the time about everything, even things we agree on. Our rivalry actually helps my grades; we even have a standing bet on who can get a higher test grade in Anatomy. In addition competing with him artistically has reminded me of how much I truly enjoy expressing myself creatively and has lead me to heavily consider a career in the arts.

nounoub21 3 / 11  
Jan 4, 2013   #2
I changed a few things just read and/or copy since you are in a hurry.
It is kind of random how you talk in depth about how your friends were TV characters and then suddenly you say that now you have friends. You should transition, and talk less about the tv characters, by introducing how you made a friend through having a common interest in one of the tv characters.


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