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Banking empire; Northwestern University supplement!



fasaran 5 / 29  
Dec 31, 2012   #1
Prompt: unique characteristics of Northwestern and the school youre applying to that attracts you to come here, and how you will take advantage of these characteristics. something like that.

______________________________________________________________________ ______________________________

Christmas is around the corner. I would lead my friends into the abyssal parking lot of the mall and draw eyes on snow-covered cars' front windows so that they would look like characters from the movie Cars. Afterwards, we would venture into the familiar halls of the mall and handout candy canes to strangers with bombs of pick-up lines dropped here and there; my favorite line of all time is "If you were an item on the McDonald menu, you would be McGorgeous." This is a tradition that my friends and I practice every Christmas, and it is one that I want to continue to practice throughout college, and that is one of the reasons on why Northwestern University is the perfect school for me. The school is composed of very sociable and outgoing students where I could easily fit in and be myself. Passionate about weight lifting, I would often hang towels off a thick tree branch to do pull ups or tie water-filled gallon-jugs to a broomstick and use it as a barbell at home. To others, this may seem strange, but at Northwestern University, I see myself starting a weight training class in the middle of a forest where everyone is doing pull-ups on tree branches or even climbing trees to get a whole body workout.

In addition to the cheerful student body, the school's location is another reason why I am irresistibly attracted to Northwestern University. The college town Evanston is filled with frequent festivals and events that keep the people of the town connected by providing a warm atmosphere. Even more, Evanston is surrounded by beautiful beaches where I see myself going surfing or even having a beach date with a girl. The college's proximity to the city of Chicago provides ample opportunities for joy and growth. Within minutes, I would be at Chicago cheering on the White Sox or be at navy pier having fun with my Northwestern peers. Lastly, the city provides many openings for potential internships that I would be applying for every summer break.

Besides the amazing setting, the school's academia is a perfect fit for my intellectual interests. Unlike other universities, Northwestern University uses the Quarter System, which will allow me to take more classes and further expand my knowledge than what is possible at other universities. Studying at the Weinberg School of Arts and Science, I plan to major in economics while studying mathematics.

Economics has always been at the center of my intellectual expansion. My passion for economics is driven by the ingenious clockwork of fractional reserve banking; in my opinion, this system of banking dominates modern economics. Complement to economics, mathematics is the sword and shield that economics wield. In my free time, I often try to invent more efficient equations or attempt to prove certain conjectures. For example, unsatisfied with Heron's formula, I derived a new equation to calculate the area of any triangle by expanding the Pythagorean Theorem geometrically. Currently, I am working to prove Fermat's Last Theorem with an end in sight; the sheer difficulty brings joy to my intellectual curiosity. At the Weinberg College, I plan to enroll in the MENU program and Northwestern's unique MMSS program to improve and discipline my mathematical skills, allowing me to successfully apply mathematics onto social sciences, thus opening many more career options. Equipped with strong math skills, I plan to pursue one of the Kellogg Certificate Programs in Financial Economics and Managerial Analytics. Doing so, I look forward to meeting Professor Mitchell Petersen and learning about venture capital and company growth. In addition, I plan to participate in the College Fed Challenge as a way to apply my learnings in economics and mathematics into use.

Overall, every aspect of Northwestern University, from its student life to its academia, will prepare me for success in the business world. It will be a key step in achieving my life's vision: to start a banking empire on which the sun never sets.

smujeeb121 1 / 6  
Jan 1, 2013   #2
You've got unique ideas and a nice style of writing! But if i were you, I would start with talking about going into economics and your dream, then work your way to surroundings and atmosphere of the campus. You've got some good specifics, like the professsor but i would include more about the undergraduate college you're applying to. I think you should rework your structure. other than that i think what you talk about is solid, you shine through. I'm applying to NU too!

I'd love for you to take a look at my UChicago essay!
OP fasaran 5 / 29  
Jan 1, 2013   #3
I would start with talking about going into economics and your dream, then work your way to surroundings and atmosphere of the campus.

:/ is it bad to go the other way around like i did in this writing? how so...?
jkim147 1 / 7  
Jan 1, 2013   #4
At the Weinberg College, I plan to enroll in the MENU program and Northwestern's unique MMSS program to improve and discipline my mathematical skills, allowing me to successfully apply mathematics onto social sciences, thus opening many more career options. Economics has always been at the center of my intellectual expansion. My passion for economics is driven by the ingenious clockwork of fractional reserve banking; in my opinion, this system of banking dominates modern economics. Complement to economics, mathematics is the sword and shield that economics wield. In my free time, I often try to invent more efficient equations or attempt to prove certain conjectures. For example, unsatisfied with Heron's formula, I derived a new equation to calculate the area of any triangle by expanding the Pythagorean Theorem geometrically. Currently, I am working to prove Fermat's Last Theorem with an end in sight; the sheer difficulty brings joy to my intellectual curiosity. Equipped with strong math skills, I plan to pursue one of the Kellogg Certificate Programs in Financial Economics and Managerial Analytics. Doing so, I look forward to meeting Professor Mitchell Petersen and learning about venture capital and company growth. In addition, I plan to participate in the College Fed Challenge as a way to apply my learnings in economics and mathematics into use.

I just rearranged this paragraph to make a better flow to the overall essay. Just a suggestion though
Also, you use "in addition" "doing so" "even more" etc etc at the beginning of a sentence a few times, try to have a better lead in or transition. Using those phrases too many times leads to breaks in your essay's overall flow

From what I read, I would say that this essay shows your personality and ambitions pretty well. Nice essay
OP fasaran 5 / 29  
Jan 1, 2013   #5
Thanks! I am trying to improve the structure. Could anyone help me T_T


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