"basketball games" - Why Duke? Supplement Essay.

Prompt: If you are applying to Trinity College of Arts and Sciences, please discuss why you consider Duke a good match for you. Is there something in particular at Duke that attracts you? Please limit your response to one or two paragraphs.

Duke basketball games have always been a family experience. We would sit around the T.V., watching as thousands of Cameron Crazies shake the floor of Coach K Court. As a kid I watched players like Shane Battier, Carlos Boozer, and Jason Williams, and aspired to follow them in playing for the tradition of excellence that is Duke basketball. However, it wasn't until I witnessed my first Duke vs North Carolina game at Cameron Indoor Stadium that I realized how it would be just as extraordinary to be a part of the student section. I couldn't take my eyes off of the crazies as they jumped up and down and roared at the opposing players as they passed by. It was an enlightening experience that showed me Duke's true value to its students as more than an institution of higher learning, but as a tight-knit community of people that truly care about one another and take pride in their school.

It is inspiring to see how palpable the sense of camaraderie is between the students who actively engage and challenge one another in and out of the classroom. Duke's mission statement states that the University is committed to the intellectual growth of students as well as their overall development as adults encouraged to be full participants as leaders in their communities. While I am not sure which field of study I would like to pursue or how exactly I am going to contribute to my community, I am certain that no matter what it is I decide I would like to do with my life Duke will be devoted and dedicated to helping me succeed.

jeff,

This is a plausible response to the prompt.However,something caught my eye at the the end.You write"There is something about Duke that has always captivated my imagination." I would ask you,WHAT IS IT?" Then you also write:"Duke is the place that I have dreamt about spending my college years, and I am looking forward to making that dream a reality." I would ask you WHY WHY and WHY.If you answer these same questions which you yourself posed in the fullest way possible ,your essay would be a winner:)

It seems as though you have adequately lauded Duke for it's greatness,but you haven't mentioned how you can match and relate your goals and interests to what Duke has to offer you,and why you should be given the opportunity to take advantage of them.Your essay definetely says"I know a lot about Duke,my brother goes there."But take it a step further by connecting your past and present experiences to what Duke has to offer.

Hope this helps you on your journey to Duke:)

I like that you focus on something very specific, like basketball, that attracts you to Duke. However, you seem to neglect the first part of the prompt, about why Duke would be a good match for you. Try to elaborate on why you would fit in at Duke, other than just basketball.

Also (and this could just be my personal preference) I don't think you should recite Duke's mission statement. They already know what it is, and they probably don't need you to tell them.

A good reason, for Duke is so famous for basketball.
Try to talk more about yourself i think.
Also try to develop more adequately on the point "tight-knit community of people that truly care about one another and take pride in their school" before you come to the great ending.

Good luck!