Hey! Thanks for reading and your welcome to tear it apart :] I was wondering whether I should take out the last paragraph and if it flows.
My first case was a seven year-old Caucasian female with a severe stomach ache. I prescribed two Oreos and a glass of milk and within seconds she was cured. This was ten years ago and my motivations for pursuing medicine have evolved from the simple desire to wear a stethoscope and lab coat. Now it is my passion for science, especially biology, that drives me to become a licensed physician.
Through my high school years I have gained academic interests that are as eclectic as the items sold on eBay; my love for Ted Hughes is equally matched by my love for derivatives. But biology has always captured my interest more than the others and it was my natural choice for a major. It never ceases to fascinate me with its wealth of information and ability to answer perplexing questions. With diverse concepts from gene expression to photosynthesis, there is no limit to learning. It is also a subject that is applicable to everyday life. So when my friend complains of brain freeze, I can explain to her that the nerve center above the roof of the mouth caused the blood vessels in her head to dilate and advise her to keep cold substances away from the roof of her mouth. Of course I aspire to achieve much greater feats with a biology major through Johns Hopkins. I aim to be one of the forces that propels JHU's research and a future medical school student working to save and improve lives.
Studying at Johns Hopkins is a great opportunity for me to pursue my dreams in medicine and become a well rounded individuals. It's academic rigor and excellent professors will give me a strong foundation of knowledge, its many research opportunities will allow me to apply concepts from books, and its diverse student body will teach me what books cannot.