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Boston University offers everything I look for in a school; Why Boston University?



Ajtgirl11 2 / 2  
Nov 2, 2013   #1
This is for BU's writing supplement. I'd really appreciate some feedback and some help correcting grammar and punctuation errors. Thank you in advance!

Prompt: In a few sentences, please tell us why BU is a good fit for you and what specifically has led you to apply for admission?

Boston University offers everything I look for in a school. The finance program allows me to major in the subject that I'm interested in while learning about business administration. The school of management offers a curriculum that will give me the in depth understanding I need to succeed in my career in finance as well as learn about other subjects I'm interested in and apply them to my core major. As the daughter of small business owners, it is my drive to know the science behind what makes a business financially successful as well as knowing how to make good financial decisions.

Aside from the stellar academics Boston University provides its students, I first decided I wanted to attend BU the day I visited the campus. First, I fell in love with the city, then, I looked for a campus that I could see myself thriving in. I researched the schools curriculum and fell in love with BU and the central location of the campus.

In conclusion, BU makes a perfect school for me because it offers an amazing finance program that I can learn from in order to succeed in my future career. It offers a broad array of resources such as a diverse student body, organizations, clubs, and state of the art facilities. Additionally, BU is located in the middle of one of the most innovative cities in the world.

dumi 1 / 6793  
Nov 2, 2013   #2
As the daughter of small business owners, it is my drive to know the science behind what makes a business financially successful as well as knowing how to make good financial decisions.

I like if you started with this point. With this you can get a clear entrance as to what you intend to do in the future. Then you can show them how your objectives can be met with what is offered at the Boston U.

Boston University offers everything I look for in a school.
while learning about business administration. The school of management offers a curriculum that will give me the in depth understanding I need to succeed in my career in finance as well as learn about other subjects I'm interested in and apply them to my core major.

Well.... it is always good to be more precise in telling them how exactly Boston U can help you achieve your goals. Go beyond the more obvious statements like;

The finance program allows me to major

.... there are many other unis offering finance courses. Tell them how their program is the best fit for you. For that you need to pick a few points and show them how they are aligned with your goals.


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