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1 in 88 children in the world are affected by Autism



amcd 3 / 4  
Sep 16, 2012   #1
THIS IS A VERY ROUGH DRAFT:

Prompt:
[Choose an issue of importance to you-the issue could be personal, school related, local, political, or international in scope-and write an essay in which you explain the significance of that issue to yourself, your family, your community, or your generation.]

Essay:

1 in 88 children in the world are affected by Autism. In 1999, my family became a part of this statistic. My youngest sister was diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome, a form of autism that affects a person's capabilities of communicating effectively with others, when I was about 5. This situation forced me to understand the affects it can have on a household's attitude, whether they are good or bad. With a new perspective on the world, I learned to develop compassion and love for others.

Growing up in a home where Autism was present, I discovered many of the differences a child with Autism may have. However, I understood from a young age that "being different" is not a flaw in character. My younger sister affected me in a way that is indescribably remarkable. All my years in school I was never one to join in on the teasing of underprivileged children, in fact, I did the exact opposite. My junior year of high school I was inspired to give back to the world of autism and began planning and organizing a community event, Burgers for Aspergers, to spread awareness about Autism. During this time of working with a nationwide organization, Autism Speaks Inc., innate qualities became apparent in my life such as communication skills and organization due to the months spent advertising and meeting with community leaders, raising money and support. The community came together in such an unbelievable way donating almost everything needed for the event. [This includes: bounce houses, food, band, venue, money]. My sister sang her heart out at the event, leaving not a dry eye in the stands. Burgers for Aspergers was an annual event raising a net amount of $15,000 for Autism research. This was an extremely humbling experience, due to the fact that I could not have succeeded without the inspiration of my younger sister.

Autism may be a disorder causing an appearance or personality difference in a person, but this does not limit the opportunities. My sister did not only affect the community showing that she had talents just as they do, but I was also affected in the way of seeing everyone as an equal. I would not be the person I am today if it were not for the "difference" I have in my family.

Jennyflower81 - / 674  
Sep 19, 2012   #2
When I was about 5, my youngest sister was diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome, a form of autism that affects a person's capabilities of communicating effectively with others.when I was about 5.

Growing up in a home where Autism was present, I discovered many of the differences a child with Autism may have.

Can you dive right into this paragraph? You may want to begin this paragraph with the line "My younger sister affected me in a way that is indescribably remarkable." But this line would sound better like this: "My younger sister affected me in a remarkable way." I think that it will draw in the reader's eye more that way. By getting right to the point, you can fit more substance into your paper.

All my years in schoolThroughout my school years , I was never one tojoined in on the teasing of underprivileged children, in fact, I did the exact opposite.

During my junior year of high school, I wasfelt inspired to give back to the world of autism.andI began planning and organizing a community event, Burgers for Aspergers, to spread awareness about Autism.


The community came together in such an unbelievable way donating almost everything needed for the event, including bouncy houses, food, a band, a venue, and money.


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