Prompt: The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?
This is my draft from over a year ago. Its really rusty and I need help from someone to proof read it. Its about 600 words and I have plenty of revisions to make on my own.Thanks I really appreciate it and be as brutal and critical as possible. The more honest it is, the more it helps! Once again Thanks
The sun brighter and warmer than it had ever been before, the sounds of the grasshoppers, the whizzing of cars passing by, all seemed so peaceful and quiet for some reason. The temperature was perfect for me alongside the relaxing sensation from the warmth of the sun, it was as if the environment accommodated its climate just for me. As if I was never going to experience the same feelings again. Exactly 1 month before, was the day my father said, "Rishan, we're are going to India, not for vacation, but to live there". A part of me felt excited for the new things I could see in India, a new beginning, but that meant I had to leave all my friends and my hometown. I was afraid to move away from friends and family, afraid of not being the, "funny", guy in class, basically afraid of losing everything other than my family. I was worried I wouldn't see them all again and that I would make no friends in India. At the moment I did not know the reason we were going to India, but all I remember on the way to India was my mother telling me that there are always friends in this world.
The environment in India was completely different from the climate I knew in America, it stinked like cow dung at times, insects buzzed everywhere and bit me, and the scorching heat from the sun made me sweat like crazy. It was summer at the time and school had already begun, I was the, "new", kid at school. The kids in my class spoke english as well as 1 other language at the least. I only knew english and felt like I did not belong in the school. But as time went on I became more familiar with the environment and started interacting more with others. I was once again known as the, "funny", kid in my class and felt as if I had been in America again. Hardly had I become familiar with this school when I was uprooted again. We had moved to another school within India. To constant moving alongside the constant estrangement from my friends made it more and more difficult for me to open myself up to other people as I knew they would someday be gone again. Due to this, I never tried to get myself accepted into social groups and waited for them to invite me as I didn't want to abandon them as I did to the others.
Soon I realized that life would be boring just waiting for others to come to me, so I decided to take the initiative and be more social with others. Two years later, I had come back to America again knowing I would stay here for a good amount of time. This time I decided to tear down the wall of introversion that I had made while in India and decided to open myself up to new people. I had later broken the barrier and was back to normal once again. This time I had decided to make relationships and preserve them instead of throwing them away. Although there is a remnant of introversion in me, I will use it to my advantage and remember to be outgoing rather than being quiet throughout all my social engagements in the future. I can say that endeavoring through these constant dilemmas has made me a more outgoing person and changed my perspective on how to communicate with people.
This is my draft from over a year ago. Its really rusty and I need help from someone to proof read it. Its about 600 words and I have plenty of revisions to make on my own.Thanks I really appreciate it and be as brutal and critical as possible. The more honest it is, the more it helps! Once again Thanks
moving to india and coming back to america
The sun brighter and warmer than it had ever been before, the sounds of the grasshoppers, the whizzing of cars passing by, all seemed so peaceful and quiet for some reason. The temperature was perfect for me alongside the relaxing sensation from the warmth of the sun, it was as if the environment accommodated its climate just for me. As if I was never going to experience the same feelings again. Exactly 1 month before, was the day my father said, "Rishan, we're are going to India, not for vacation, but to live there". A part of me felt excited for the new things I could see in India, a new beginning, but that meant I had to leave all my friends and my hometown. I was afraid to move away from friends and family, afraid of not being the, "funny", guy in class, basically afraid of losing everything other than my family. I was worried I wouldn't see them all again and that I would make no friends in India. At the moment I did not know the reason we were going to India, but all I remember on the way to India was my mother telling me that there are always friends in this world.
The environment in India was completely different from the climate I knew in America, it stinked like cow dung at times, insects buzzed everywhere and bit me, and the scorching heat from the sun made me sweat like crazy. It was summer at the time and school had already begun, I was the, "new", kid at school. The kids in my class spoke english as well as 1 other language at the least. I only knew english and felt like I did not belong in the school. But as time went on I became more familiar with the environment and started interacting more with others. I was once again known as the, "funny", kid in my class and felt as if I had been in America again. Hardly had I become familiar with this school when I was uprooted again. We had moved to another school within India. To constant moving alongside the constant estrangement from my friends made it more and more difficult for me to open myself up to other people as I knew they would someday be gone again. Due to this, I never tried to get myself accepted into social groups and waited for them to invite me as I didn't want to abandon them as I did to the others.
Soon I realized that life would be boring just waiting for others to come to me, so I decided to take the initiative and be more social with others. Two years later, I had come back to America again knowing I would stay here for a good amount of time. This time I decided to tear down the wall of introversion that I had made while in India and decided to open myself up to new people. I had later broken the barrier and was back to normal once again. This time I had decided to make relationships and preserve them instead of throwing them away. Although there is a remnant of introversion in me, I will use it to my advantage and remember to be outgoing rather than being quiet throughout all my social engagements in the future. I can say that endeavoring through these constant dilemmas has made me a more outgoing person and changed my perspective on how to communicate with people.