Common App: Discuss some issue of personal, local, national, or international concern

Discuss some issue of personal, local, national, or international concern and its importance to you.
250+ words.
I would love opinions on everything about this essay! Title choice, length, ect. Thanks!!

Civil Rights

We Americans don't even realize how fortunate we are to say what is on our mind and what is important to our beliefs. There are several countries around the world that make it a crime for someone to speak out in public. People are imprisoned or even murdered for speaking out for what is right. Over the past couple of years, there have been multiple rebellions in the Middle East that have led to destruction and death. These revolts just show how much the citizens of those countries want their rights to be heard. I find myself blessed to have the freedom of speech, religion, and assembly, but I find it important that everyone in the world should have these rights also.

Civil rights across the world is important to me because I want to know that everyone in the world has the opportunity to do what they want, and have a say in something they don't think it is right. I don't want to have to read an article about a man being hung for protesting against his government, or a young woman being shot for advocating women's education rights. I am passionate about what I want my career to be like. To go into the medical field is a dream I have had for several years, and if that dream was taken away from me I would want to speak out about it. Fortunately I can, while someone just like me across the world would have to move on in order to avoid the punishments given for speaking out. I hope that one day there will be an international acknowledgment of civil rights, and we can all speak out for what is best for all of us.

(290 words)

I would say the essay seems very general...maybe try to focus on a specific encounter you've had in a situation where your rights or someone else's were oppressed? The little bit about your interest in the medical field also seems a bit out of place.

Hope that helps?

agreed^ also, this is a very touchy topic so be careful with the way you spin it if you continue to pursue this topic. as for advice, you need to write a more specific encounter before the college can begin to see who you actually are.

I agree with the other guys..its a little too general and be more specific to bring our true self .otherwise good topic :)

i like the topic but you should make it more personal. why exactly is becoming a doctor so important to you and how does it tie into civil rights?