What do I find appealing about Columbia? A better question to ask would be: What does not appeal to me about Columbia? From its world-renowned academic reputation to its numerous extra-curricular activities- these aspects, whether it be small or large, are what draws me to Columbia University. Columbia's diverse courses allows me to engage in studies that not only captivate me but also opens me up to new subjects I have not been exposed to before. Through Columbia's Core Curriculum I am allowed this opportunity. Although these classes may be rigorous, they allow me to explore subjects and topics I would have never sought otherwise. These curriculums allow Columbia's students to become well-rounded, not only intellectually, but also physically disciplined due to the physical education requirement.
Columbia University is also located within the heart of New York City. It is every college student's fantasy to live on a bustling, lively campus surrounded by beautiful skylines. Being located within a populous city also means that it could provide many opportunities, such as internships, that many other universities could not provide. Aside from internships, vast amounts of museums and exhibitions allow for cultural enrichment and entertainment for the students. This allows for students to take a break once in awhile from their busy school lives, to just relax and relieve themselves from stress.
Since this is my first draft, any improvements would be appreciated!
Minju. one of the questions that I found myself asking as I read your response was "Why doesn't he have a major in mind? Is that why he is thankful for the Core Curriculum?" I think that if you do not have a major in mind yet, then you should definitely concentrate your answer on just the core curriculum as being the one academic reason that you chose to attend Columbia. Your response in that case should be more along the lines of the university allowing you to "get your feet wet" by trying all possible major course scenarios before you finally settle on the one that you feel is right for you. Then dwell on the explanation that this type of education is a rare opportunity that people like you can take advantage of while you try to get your college legs steady.
As for the social aspect of attending Columbia, don't discuss the city in general, nor the internships. Look to the campus community for your response to that. Talk about the various community activities that you feel you will not only help you settle in, but also allow you to become an integral part of the community through your participation in specific organizations or activities.
the strongest part of your essay is the introduction. I am really impressed by how your opening line ; What do I find appealing about Columbia? A better question to ask would be: What does not appeal to me about Columbia? Keep that. The line is a winner that has a great chance of reeling in the reviewer. It works very well. Just try to adjust the other parts of the essay so that we can further improve your response. The answers you gave are okay, but could be better :-) So, let's work on it.
Minju, I'd like to help you out with your essay.
- What do I find appealing about Columbia? A better question to ask would be: What does not appeal to me about Columbia?I suggest deleting this part of the essay, as quirky as it may sound, it sounds like your mocking the one's who formulated the question or like questioning how they phrase the question, so be careful.
- up to new subjects that I have not been exposed to before.
- Through Columbia's Core Curriculum I am allowed this opportunity. Although, these classes, however may be rigorous,
- These curriculumsThe University allows Columbia's students to become well-rounded,
- not only intellectually, but also to be physically disciplined
- due to thewith it's strict physical education requirement.
- It is every college student's fantasy(speak only for yourself as this is your own essay) to live on a bustling,
- BeingL ocated within a populous city also
- means that it could provide many opportunities, such as internships,
- that many other universities could not provideoffer .
- Aside from internships, vast amounts of museums and exhibitions
- allowsforfurther cultural enrichment and entertainment for the students.
- This allows forgives students to take a break once in awhile
- from their busy school lives, todays and just relax and relieve themselves from stress.
There you have it Minju, I hope my remarks helped.
