Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width   Posts: 5


ESSAY- Cornell Schoolof Architecture



dollarchitect 2 / 3  
Dec 19, 2009   #1
I'm really bad at grammar - anyways, the prompt is :

How does the major you would like to study in the College of Architecture, Art, and Planning match your intellectual, academic, and career interests? Discuss any activities you have engaged in that are relevant to your chosen major.

For a long time, it was the beautiful and thought-provoking exhibits of the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum that captivated me. I didn't expect anything to be different when we arrived for a sketching session in DC, certainly not after just 3 days of Arch 150.

The abstract concepts of space were still floating around aimlessly in my head. I had started my subtractive cube project with the vague goal of creating "interesting spaces", without knowing what exactly constituted an "interesting space". The idea of having an organizational strategy, a thesis, didn't click yet. It was a hodge podge of confusion for me, but also a delightful challenge.

Amazingly though, in the three days, my fumblings with architecture had already given me new sight. For a second, the museum seemed to have been completely renovated. Architectural details that were lost to me were suddenly salient. The widening stairs, something that passed me by entirely before, distorted the space. Three gaping rectangles weighted in on the long side of the skewed roof, highlighting the extremely asymmetrical layout. Although the structure never made any impression for me in the past, the space was suddenly dark and chaotic. Perplexed, my Siddhartha moment came when I realized that Freed was evoking the same ideas as the black and white photographs behind the glass. We were the prisoners in the concentration camp.

As I anchored the last piece of chipboard on to my cube, my fingers sticky with clumps of craft glue, I thought about the clarity that came after my visit to DC. Architecture is art, but also structure and reason. There is rationale behind the forms, constraint behind abstraction. Slowly, I began to find direction in my projects, to appreciate the courage of Maya Lin, to understand the visions of Le Corbusier and Venturi. The multidisciplinary nature of architecture bridged the gap between my two greatest passions, art and science. To create architecture, I needed to not only think visually and spatially but also to think critically and analytically. As an architect, I can be both a dreamer and a pragmatist, creative and analytical, whimsical and rational.

Seeing architects in real life at work only strengthened my enthusiasm. During week two of the course, we found ourselves in the clean and modern space of Design Collective, a Baltimore architecture firm. Palatial scale models of real-life projects took up entire rooms while scribbles of blue and red on drafting paper decked the walls. An architect talked about a brewery themed project going on in Texas, which involved getting a taste of beer (to better understand the culture of his site of course!). It was not sedentary work: trips to sites and meetings with clients take architects around the world and communication with landscape architects, urban planners, and interior designers makes the process truly collaborative.

It was a profound feeling when we walked backed out into the street. The firm's Baltimore Visitors Center stood as a ripple of sliver by the harbor. It was strange but remarkable, seeing the actual structure, no longer just a model or drawing. As my eyes darted off into the urban landscape, the overwhelming force, the immeasurable potential of architecture hit me like a brick.

I wanted to be part of the landscape too.

RabiaG 1 / 26  
Dec 19, 2009   #2
remove the in the first sentence

thought provoking exhibits that drew me to the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum. <---
Reword that sentence.

Certainly not after just 3 days of taking Arch 150. <---It sounds incomplete, you can either do two things
1) remove it because you mentioned later that three days...
2) OR you can add it with the previous sentence.

It was a hodge podge of confusion for me, but also a delightful challenge.
Doesn't "hodge podge" mean confusion?
I like this sentence, but I think you should reword it.

My most fav. sentences in this piece were
1)I wanted to be part of the landscape too.
2) To create architecture, I needed to not only think visually and spatially but also to think critically and analytically. As an architect, I can be both a dreamer and a pragmatist, creative and analytical, whimsical and rational. <---I like the list of words, they are all different, yet great attributes to being an architect.

3) Perplexed, my Siddhartha moment came when I realized that Freed was evoking the same ideas as the black and white photographs behind the glass. We were the prisoners in the concentration camp.

Overall this piece engaged me.
The last sentence, literally tied the ideas and theme.

Just a few changes here and there, would make it stronger.
OP dollarchitect 2 / 3  
Dec 20, 2009   #3
Thanks for the feedback! I wasn't sure what you meant by deleting the in the first sentence.
Are there any glaring grammatical mistakes?
RabiaG 1 / 26  
Dec 20, 2009   #4
Oh, Sorry. I mean't to delete the word "the" in your first sentence.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Dec 21, 2009   #5
It was a hodge podge of confusion for me, but also a delightful challenge.

Good sentence!!!!!!

As I anchored the last piece of chipboard onto my cube, my fingers sticky with clumps of craft glue, I thought about the clarity that came after my visit to DC. ----> you have a great way with words.

Read this essay again tomorrow morning, and you will come up with improvements for the conclusion paragraph. I really like "hit me like a brick" the way you used it.

The whole essay is great, and you almost made me want to learn architecture.


Home / Undergraduate / ESSAY- Cornell Schoolof Architecture
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳