"Creative, communicative multi-faceted engineers" - USC Viterbi Supplemental Essay

Hi all, I'm about to submit my USC application/supplement via the common app.
I was hoping to get some constructive criticism on my viterbi supplemental essay.

Prompt:

All applications to Engineering and Computer Science majors should respond to the following
questions, in approximately one paragraph, and attach their responses to the Supplement.

1. Engineering leaders do more than just solve technical problems. What kinds of experiences, inside and outside the classroom, would you want to explore to enhance your studies?

2. Engineers have sometimes been stereotyped as "nerds" or "geeks". Do you embrace or reject that stereotype? Why?

The typical picture of a computer scientist is an overweight white male hammering away at a keyboard while eating potato chips at three in the morning, but this could not be farther from the truth. Like any other engineering profession, computer science involves not only the ability to solve technical problems, but more importantly the ability to communicate with people of different majors, different ethnicities, and different backgrounds. I had my first taste of this in Nyborg, Denmark, when I participated in a student organization that built various engineering projects and had members from many different countries. There is no better place to further these skills than at USC, as it has the largest international student body of any university in the U.S. There are classrooms and student organizations/clubs where the opportunities are numerous for participating in discussions with people from all different backgrounds. Collaborating with my peers in Viterbi School of Engineering and throughout the USC campus will enhance my education and allow me to go onto being a successful engineer in my field of study.

Creative intellectuals such as engineers are often pejoratively labeled "nerds" or "geeks" by society, but this is rather short-sighted as there is so much more to these individuals than such simple labels portray. Yes engineers do spend a lot of time on intellectual pursuits while others would rather spend their time hanging out with friends or going to a movie, but this is only a small part of what it means to be an engineer. It means being dedicated and hardworking, having good communicative ability, and being able to think creatively. As aforementioned, engineers have to have the ability to communicate with people with various backgrounds. Engineers have to be creative to be able to come up with the next new idea, just as Einstein turned a universal speed limit into visions of curved space-time and other fantastical ideas. I reject the stereotype of "nerd" or "geek" as it only presents only one facet of these multifaceted individuals.

What do you think?

Thanks,
Mikael

I think the beginning comes out weak, mainly because I, myself, know many cool, fit, perfectly healthy computer scientists, and a lot of others reading could get the same reaction. I like the stereotype idea, since it fits the prompt, but don't generalize to "this is a typical computer scientist". Think of an experience where this happened; it makes it more realistic, relatable, and convincing to the reader. You could even say something like, "everyday, my comp sci teacher wore his pants up to his chin and glasses that magnified the nerdiness of his eyes" or whatever--it is something that you personally have experienced. An experience like this is, in my opinion, the BEST way to go about writing a college essay. Otherwise it never gets stronger than "Stereotypes are bad. Computer Scientists aren't really nerds, they help society advance in the world, and at least they are passionate about something. Oh and by the way, I do a lot of service for my community and have good grades too so pick me." You need to show yourself, rather than just directly and blindly attack the issue at hand. Another tip is to spend AS MUCH TIME AS POSSIBLE on writing your essay(s), it is probably the most important to remember! I hope this helps a little! GOODLUCK, I HOPE YOU GET INTO USC!!! :D