PROMPT: Discuss an accomplishment or event, formal or informal, that marked your transition from childhood to adulthood within your culture, community, or family.
As the leaves began to turn in the fall of 2005, my reality changed with them. On a cool October morning, I sat at the breakfast table watching my sister's tears stream down her face. She pushed her chair back to run away and I followed her stride, but I did not know why. What had my parents said that had made her so upset?
Simultaneously, in Morristown, New Jersey, a mere 90 miles from my house, my father's girlfriend watched the leaves fall while rubbing her growing stomach after a kick from my soon-to-be half brother. In March, when the leaves began to grow back, I was excited for Stijn's birth. A naive child, I was oblivious to the fact that the baby growing inside my new mom's belly was the product of my father's infidelity. I did not think my parents could make mistakes. They had always been there to protect me. They knew the answer to every question. They had always seemed like superheroes.
Over time, I began to realize the significance of that October morning like my sister had. I understood the mistakes that my father had made and the hearts he had broken. My father was less like Superman and more like Clark Kent. As my perception of my father shattered, so too did my childhood innocence. I was angry. I was sad. I was confused. My ignorance as a child had suddenly been contested, yet I never dared ask why and he never explained himself. He never apologized. My father never even acknowledged what had happened. My family's known secret lived within the confines of my mind. Over time, however, I realized that this horrible mistake had brought my little brother to me. And my love for Stijn allowed me to forgive my father even though he had never apologized.
My brother Stijn is an innocent treasure created by deceit and distrust. Despite the broken hearts and promises that faced my family 11 years ago, my brother has brought happiness and joy to my life every day since. Watching him grow up smiling and vivacious, I have learned that even horrible mistakes can create life's greatest treasures. Therefore, I view my brother as a gift that has improved my life instead of a mistake that tore my family apart. I see that he possesses the same innocence I once did. The same trust and reverence when looking at his parents. The same belief that they have never made a mistake. He lives in a world with no imperfections.
While looking up to his parents, he also looks to me to guide him and do the right thing. However, as I become an adult, I recognize that making mistakes is one of the finest opportunities received in life, allowing for a moment of learning. I recognize that mistakes like these, are the mistakes that mold a life forever. I understand that my father did not make his mistakes with malice in his heart. Even though he is not perfect, he has loved his children unconditionally, allowing me to understand the true meaning of family. Through the pain of my own personal experience, I decided that it was better to forgive my father because of love for my brother than to carry on the hatred contained in my mind.
As winter approaches, leaves change colors and drift to the ground because their tree is not receiving enough sunlight. This cycle of renewal allows the tree to return each spring stronger and more beautiful with new leaves. Similarly, I have become a stronger person through the lessons I have learned from this experience. I am not afraid to make mistakes as I move forward in my life because I am wise enough to know they have meaning. Therefore, the pain that rippled through my family had a silver lining.
As the leaves began to turn in the fall of 2005, my reality changed with them. On a cool October morning, I sat at the breakfast table watching my sister's tears stream down her face. She pushed her chair back to run away and I followed her stride, but I did not know why. What had my parents said that had made her so upset?
Simultaneously, in Morristown, New Jersey, a mere 90 miles from my house, my father's girlfriend watched the leaves fall while rubbing her growing stomach after a kick from my soon-to-be half brother. In March, when the leaves began to grow back, I was excited for Stijn's birth. A naive child, I was oblivious to the fact that the baby growing inside my new mom's belly was the product of my father's infidelity. I did not think my parents could make mistakes. They had always been there to protect me. They knew the answer to every question. They had always seemed like superheroes.
Over time, I began to realize the significance of that October morning like my sister had. I understood the mistakes that my father had made and the hearts he had broken. My father was less like Superman and more like Clark Kent. As my perception of my father shattered, so too did my childhood innocence. I was angry. I was sad. I was confused. My ignorance as a child had suddenly been contested, yet I never dared ask why and he never explained himself. He never apologized. My father never even acknowledged what had happened. My family's known secret lived within the confines of my mind. Over time, however, I realized that this horrible mistake had brought my little brother to me. And my love for Stijn allowed me to forgive my father even though he had never apologized.
My brother Stijn is an innocent treasure created by deceit and distrust. Despite the broken hearts and promises that faced my family 11 years ago, my brother has brought happiness and joy to my life every day since. Watching him grow up smiling and vivacious, I have learned that even horrible mistakes can create life's greatest treasures. Therefore, I view my brother as a gift that has improved my life instead of a mistake that tore my family apart. I see that he possesses the same innocence I once did. The same trust and reverence when looking at his parents. The same belief that they have never made a mistake. He lives in a world with no imperfections.
While looking up to his parents, he also looks to me to guide him and do the right thing. However, as I become an adult, I recognize that making mistakes is one of the finest opportunities received in life, allowing for a moment of learning. I recognize that mistakes like these, are the mistakes that mold a life forever. I understand that my father did not make his mistakes with malice in his heart. Even though he is not perfect, he has loved his children unconditionally, allowing me to understand the true meaning of family. Through the pain of my own personal experience, I decided that it was better to forgive my father because of love for my brother than to carry on the hatred contained in my mind.
As winter approaches, leaves change colors and drift to the ground because their tree is not receiving enough sunlight. This cycle of renewal allows the tree to return each spring stronger and more beautiful with new leaves. Similarly, I have become a stronger person through the lessons I have learned from this experience. I am not afraid to make mistakes as I move forward in my life because I am wise enough to know they have meaning. Therefore, the pain that rippled through my family had a silver lining.
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