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Dear future roommate- My day in a nutshell / Stanford



viraa 2 / 6  
Dec 23, 2012   #1
this is one of those short answer Stanford essays (2500 ch.) does this sound a bit too bubbly? the rest of my essays are pretty serious so idk if it compensates.

First of all- Congratulations! We're officially Cardinals. It's hard not to sound self- absorbed while describing yourself to someone so I've chosen to tell you how a day in my life goes. I write this in hopes that it will help you understand me better.

My day only begins with a cafÊ sans crème and a call from Michael Bay hoping for me to sign his next film. After a brunch with Obama, my day usually is spent making some kind of groundbreaking discovery. Feel free to thank me for the Higgs Boson particle when we meet. By nightfall there's an Oscar in one of my hands and a dry martini in the other. Oh what a day! Then an annoying sound fills my ears. I reach for the nearest thing to cover my ears but find my hand dripping in salsa sauce. What says 'good morning' better than the salsa you fell asleep beside last night?

There's good news and bad news; I'm an hour behind schedule but I'm ready for the quiz today, at the cost of 4 hours of sleep. School is a vicious cycle of monotony; learn, sneak-into-your-lunch-during-chemistry, learn a bit more and play football. When I return home, instead of congratulating me on the 24/25 score, my grandmother interrogates me as to where that last mark went. School is preceded by extra classes and then swimming practices. Once I'm home, there's a raging war between my legs and my stomach. My legs draw me towards the bed and my stomach towards the kitchen; the stomach usually wins. Finally, I fall onto my bed and just as my eyes are about close into a mesmerizing slumber, I realize I had yet to watch that funny video Katelyn told me about. Bring out that laptop; sleep is for the weak!

I'm pretty bubbly and I like to ensure everyone else around me stays that way too, no matter how tough the going gets. In return, all I ask of you, is to bear with my family which recently has gotten acquainted with the marvels of video chatting and my intermittent cravings for Mexican food. Rest assured- I'm looking forward to making the best of memories in our time together.

dumi 1 / 6793  
Dec 23, 2012   #2
I've chosen to tell you how a day in my life goes

... good idea; sounds creative :D

my grandmother interrogates me as to where that last mark went

... :D

I'm pretty bubbly and I like to ensure everyone else around me stays that way too

... Hope your roommate is not going to be a super introvert :D

Well, I enjoyed your essay a lot. I liked your witty style and this looks pretty creative. Hope the admission guys too would find this the same way :P

Good luck!
nairbear68 6 / 29  
Dec 23, 2012   #3
your letter is very fun to read! this essay is in fact supposed to be the most informal one for stanford, so your bubbliness is fine :)

the only thing is, i think the salsa bit is a little too random and unrelated. i was confused why you fell asleep by salsa lol

if i try to change anything, it'll ruin the style of the essay, so just let it be!

please take a look at my upenn essay and tell me what you think if you have time :) thanks and good luck!


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