"diverse coworkers" - common app short answer--work and friends

This is for the common application short answer prompt:
Please briefly elaborate on one of your extra curricular activities or work experiences in the space below.

As soon as I got my driver's license I knew the next step for me was a job. Being in high school, I could only have a part-time, minimum wage job; I chose Fox's Pizza. It provided me with an adequate amount for spending and saving, but left me with little free time. Although I grew apart from a few, I quickly realized who my true friends were. Through the typical rolling dough, sprinkling cheese, and slicing vegetables, I developed friendships with many of my diverse coworkers. I never would have befriended these middle-aged, part-time workers or teenagers in my school from different social cliques if it was not for this job. What simply began as a check for college savings and new clothes, ended with lasting relationships with the most unexpected people.

Thank you very much in advance for your critiquing of my essay, I greatly appreciate it!

As soon as I got my driver's license, I knew the next step for me was to get a job.

Being in high school, I could only have a part-time, minimum wage job, so I chose to work at Fox's Pizza.

It provided me with an adequate amount of money for spending and saving, but left me with little free time.

Through the typical hours spent rolling dough, sprinkling cheese, and slicing vegetables, I developed friendships with many of my diverse coworkers.

I like your essay! Good luck in school and have fun!

:)