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Drama Design: Carnegie Mellon Supp Esssay: Why I Chose This?



banana1214 1 / -  
Oct 24, 2010   #1
Please submit a one-page, single-spaced essay that explains why you have chosen Carnegie Mellon and your particular major(s), department(s) or program(s). This essay should include the reasons why you've chosen the major(s), any goals or relevant work plans and any other information you would like us to know. If you are applying to more than one college or program, please mention each college or program you are applying to. Because our admission committees review applicants by college and programs, your essay can impact our final decision. Please do not exceed one page for this essay.

I believe that this time of the year is the major moment in my life - choosing the major I would like to study further and the university that would guide me to successful life afterward. I have chosen Carnegie Mellon University as my prior choice not because of its prestigious value, but because of its innovative faculties and programs. Being an undergraduate of College of Fine Art, School of Drama will give me an opportunity of engaging with large professionals. Majoring in Drama Design program will build me rich with the storytelling abilities through the theatre stage. I have not simply decided in applying to Carnegie Mellon - I am desired to experience what Carnegie Mellon has to offer to its students.

Carnegie Mellon's prestigious value has attracted me as a high school freshman. However now as a senior, I deeply consider this university as a place of achieving my goal. The school has a small student-to-faculty ratio, staying in close relationship with its students. Most universities have myriad of students in the classroom with one or two teachers, failing to manage the students' progresses and their personal interests. Additionally, the Carnegie Mellon faculties "innovate" to provide beneficial classroom learnings. Under the highly motivated professionals and competitive students, I would like to extend my abilities and share the common interests. What Carnegie Mellon offers to its student is limitless; however, in my opinion, the most important aspect is the school's learning environment which will arouse me take academic actions.

The School of Drama in the College of Fine Art specifically offers numerous opportunities which I can get engaged with huge professionals. The school suggests students to participate in every productions of drama and special programs. I have read about the Wats:on? Festival of the Arts, and I really want to experience the sources it provides. How attractive is it to learn from numerous artists and designers through their lectures, performances, and exhibitions! Furthermore, I learned that the School of Drama provides a trip to New York and Los Angeles as an introduction to the profession. These contributions absolutely fascinate me, recognizing how much the school puts efforts for every students' successful futures.

What I am mostly fascinated by is the program of the major I chose - Drama Design. The foundation courses which the design program offer may be similar from California to Rhode Island. However, Carnegie Mellon uniquely focuses on development of the storytelling ability as well as the artistic understanding. I want to successfully inform the play to audiences through stage, light, sound, and costumes. My devotion to majoring in drama design includes doing work that is literature-related, and Carnegie Mellon's Drama program includes that teaching favorably. By analyzing myriad of plays, I want to appreciate literature and its deep meanings within the texts.

I have chosen to apply to Carnegie Mellon with deep and wise considerations. With such acknowledged faculty and its learning environment, who would not be drawn into this school? Who would want to disregard these plentiful opportunities the school arranges? By searching the various programs the school and each department offer, I concluded that Carnegie Mellon is the place where I want to perform my passion.

I did not know how to start this off. So, i just went step to step explaining what the university offers and how the department I am specifically majoring in provides learning to their students. I used 3-point essay structure that I learned frequently over and over and over during my high school years. Any suggestion?? This is my first draft... so any comment on how I started off please :)

karebearr 2 / 8  
Oct 25, 2010   #2
From what I'm reading, you fully answered the prompt so that's a good start. If I was writing this essay, I might throw in some of my personal experience and how going to Carnegie Mellon would help me improve if that experience happens again. (i'm hoping that made some sense =___=) I think the overall structure is good, but elaborate? From what I hear, colleges do look at supplements a bit more. So good luck!!
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Oct 28, 2010   #3
I don't think moment is the right word. "Milestone" might be the right word here.
I believe that this time of the year is the major moment milestone...

"to be" ---"for"---> However now as a senior, I deeply consider this university to be a place for achieving my goal.

Try to get this down to 300 words. You can improve it by condensing it. Cut the weakest players from the team. :-)


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