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A few extra revelations about myself - USC additional essay



dubtsai 1 / 1  
Oct 21, 2017   #1

Details of circumstances or qualifications not reflected in the application



The screeching of my front door gave me a sense of discomfort as I stormed into my room. I was fourteen and a freshman in high school. That was the first day of high school, and the first day without my mother greeting me as I came home waiting to tell her how my first day went. This was the same person who would ask me about my day and make me warm home-made food after a long day of school. After being a part of my life for thirteen years, she was gone.

I had always been an outcast as a kid, although I was born in America, I was raised with a heavily influenced Asian culture and I didn't understand the American lifestyle. I grew up in a far-knitted family and didn't know how to communicate well with others. Thus the absence of my mother exacerbated this situation as I tried to unhealthily suppress uncertainty about myself. The next few years of high school was a train wreck. I had trouble finding a circle of friends that I could rely on in the absence of my family figures. No one understood my circumstances and judged me and my mother for her absence and my actions. I tried defending myself by telling myself that I was important, and I would be okay, but inside, I still was addicted to other people's perception of me.

Throughout high school and eventually entering college, I spent countless hours reflecting about how people perceived me and shared these thoughts with myself since my single-mother has been absent. I began to blame my mother for my insecurities as she wasn't there for me through my time of adolescence, but I started to understand this moment in a different light. Given her circumstances - migrating here in search of a better future, only to find herself being single and raising two kids of her own on welfare at point, having such a hard time in the American system; my mother made the decision to leave and work in Asia where she was able to finally support her children.

I started caring more about my well-being than other people's opinions about me. I began talking to others about things that fascinated me, like fashion design and the international market, instead of desperately searching for other's approval. I stopped going to social outings with people that I thought were my friends, realizing that I was only there for the fabricated happiness that it brought me, and started designing clothes because I wanted to do something that would bring my happiness instead of receiving monetary bliss. I eventually became the person that I envisioned myself to be, which worked out when I started realizing what made me happy. My self-evaluation shifted from others' perception to self-respect.

As I open my front door every day, I stop and think about everything that has happened and I think of a positive outcome. However, in hindsight, I am incredibly grateful for my mother's decision on leaving. Her reasons that had once caused the pain was a necessary step in the process of becoming the man that I am today, someone who isn't afraid of being an outcast. Topic is what is something about yourself that is essential to understanding you

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15384  
Oct 22, 2017   #2
Wesley, this is most certainly not an extenuating circumstance that related to your academic development and final high school GPA. I believe that is what this essay is all about right? This essay is more like a cleansing of your soul, not a description of a circumstance that might affect the decision of the adcom regarding your application in relation to any academic setbacks you might have had. Perhaps you still have time to revise the essay in order to create a more academic circumstance? I mean an academic event or situation that affected your grades unfairly. You have to discuss how you improved your scores eventually and that these circumstances do not accurately reflect your academic intellect and abilities. Think of how you can revise the essay to better address this requirement. The reviewer will be looking for an opportunity to get to know you better and how you handle certain stresses in life. That is what you should be reflecting in your essay. Your ability to bounce back from potentially debilitating circumstances.
OP dubtsai 1 / 1  
Oct 23, 2017   #3
Hi Holt,
Thank you for the constructive criticism. I was confused because I wanted to use this topic, but I didn't want it to come off as a pity essay. That's why I added somewhat of a revelation.


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