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My first memorable experience into the realm of science - general medicine essay



vip747 4 / 18  
Sep 27, 2009   #1
My first memorable experience into the realm of science occurred during the summer of my 3rd grade. During a family visit to my uncle in Delaware, my cousin pulled me into his room and started trying to teach me some basic chemistry? I can still remember to this day how he attempted to show me how electrons were arranged around the atoms and how that would affect its ability to react with other atoms. Although I could barely understand what my cousin was talking about my interest for science was sparked. I remember how I would come home from school and watch shows like "The Magic School Bus" and "Bill Nye the Science Guy" and read books on the topic endlessly.

As I grew older, my interest in science grew with me. When I entered high school, I was introduced to the "main" science courses: Biology, Chemistry, and Physics. These courses took my enjoyment of science to a whole new level. I enrolled in the highest level classes I could take. These courses had a deep impact on me. I can still remember how, during my biology course, I began to entertain thoughts about pursuing a career in medicine.

When I entered my junior year my goals towards a career in science became more focused. One of the biggest factors in choosing to become a doctor would come from an accident that my grandfather suffered in the winter. While taking a daily walk around in our development, he slipped on black ice leaving his entire hip and left leg fractured. After medical treatment at a hospital and rehabilitation at a local nursing home, he was finally able to return to our home. For the next twelve months, my family and I cared for him at home; as we watched his condition slowly improved. I gained exposure to the medical field as I spoke with the doctors and therapists that visited our home, checking up on my grandfather.

Although I had become interested in the field, I still had very little knowledge about it. In order to get a view of the field I was accepted to the Robert Wood Johnson Mini-Medical School, where I listened to various lectures by doctors on topics throughout the medical field. Most of the lectures turned out to be extremely thought provoking, further fueling my ambition to enter medicine.

During the summer of my junior year I enrolled in the competitive Summer Science Scholars program at the University of Medicine and Dentistry of New Jersey. During this program I took classes in various medicinal topics, such as anatomy and neurology, as well as making trips to Robert Wood Johnson hospital to participate in discussions on topics such as cardiovascular disease and pediatric care. In addition I shadowed doctors at the Kailash Cancer Hospital and Research Centre during my trip to India. Here I was able to get valuable experience as I worked with doctors, including a pathologist, a radiotherapist, radiologist technician, various chemotherapists, and a physicist. I was able to observe as they interacted with their patients in their own unique ways. I saw how radiation therapy was planned on a computer, how a pathologist would observe tissue samples to search for cancer, and how a chemotherapist created a treatment for each patient. With every minute that I spent working with these professionals, I felt like I wanted to become just like them.

kl24 1 / 5  
Sep 27, 2009   #2
my cousin pulled me into his room and started trying to teach me some basic chemistry?

Just wondering why you ended that with a question mark.

May I see the full prompt for this essay? As far as I can tell, it's basically a narrative of your interest in science.
OP vip747 4 / 18  
Sep 27, 2009   #3
Many applications for medical programs ask me to describe why i became interested in medicine and how i developed that interest.

and i'll change that ? mark
OP vip747 4 / 18  
Sep 27, 2009   #4
Can anybody else help me?
OP vip747 4 / 18  
Sep 28, 2009   #5
Please can someone help me?
OP vip747 4 / 18  
Sep 29, 2009   #6
I have received no advice on the content of my essay after posting it for 2 days
can some one please look over my essay?
OP vip747 4 / 18  
Oct 6, 2009   #7
10 days later and still no help
thanks a lot people

I went through the essay and made my own minor corrections. can someone please read this and answer me?

My introduction into the world of science occurred during the summer after 3rd grade. During a family visit to my uncle in Delaware, my cousin pulled me into his room and started trying to teach me some basic chemistry. I still remember to this day how he attempted to show me how electrons were arranged around the atoms and how that would affect its ability to react with other atoms. Although I could barely understand what he was talking about, my interest for science was sparked. I started watching shows like "The Magic School Bus" and "Bill Nye the Science Guy" and read books on the topic endlessly.

SEE ABOVE
EF_Sean 6 / 3460  
Oct 7, 2009   #8
The essay is okay. You don't have any problems with grammar or style, and you use narrative anecdotes to demonstrate your points with specific details. If there is anything wrong with it at all, it's that it reads very matter-of-factly. There is no great sense that you are passionate about the field, only solidly interested in it. I could be a bit biased, though. I've read a lot of admissions essays on this site recently, and someone going into a medical field because a relative got injured or became sick is fairly common, as is the general desire to help people that you reference part way through your essay.
OP vip747 4 / 18  
Oct 11, 2009   #9
OK. thanks for the help. I went back and tried to emphasize the medical part.
OP vip747 4 / 18  
Oct 12, 2009   #10
Im planning on submitting this essay for the nov 1st deadline so i would like to quickly wrap things up


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