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'God on my side' - COMMON APP ESSAY FOR CALVIN COLLEGE



samkumah 1 / -  
Oct 28, 2012   #1
Calvin College seeks students who will thrive in the academic, spiritual and community life at Calvin. With this in mind, how do you see yourself contributing to the Christian learning environment at Calvin?

Born into a family of down to earth Christian, I have been nurtured and trained with standard Christian principles standard and with my father being an ordained Baptist reverend, I gave my life to the lord at a very tender age. With these Christian values inculcated into me by my family, I see myself at Calvin College portraying a readiness to contribute to improving an already flamboyant Christian learning environment. To achieve this great target of adequately contributing to the Christian learning environment at Calvin, I would first and foremost make it my number one priority to abide by rules and regulations governing this great institution. Also I would it a priority to join an active group or organization be it a bible study group where I would participate wholeheartedly in the activities of the organization and also share innovative ideas and solutions to issues as they occur. Furthermore, with my immense passion towards helping others, I would offer my expertise be it in sports, academic work, or social issues to my fellow mates when it is needed.. That synergy of teamwork, excellence and dedication to society I will bring on board the Class of 2017 will mark that flourish on the Calvin campus

With God on my side I would strive to achieve excellence, inspire my fellow mates, and walk and talk Christianity as I advance towards achieving my heart's desire at such a prestigious institution. God bless Calvin College.

NEED A REVIEW BEFORE THE DAY ENDS.. THANKX

ranimeks 1 / 1  
Nov 9, 2012   #2
Firstly, the essay seems rather short. Is there a word limit? Nevertheless, i think you should change "number one priority" to "topmost". Change "Also I would it" to "Also it would be". Revise this "I would offer my expertise be it in sports, academic work, or social issues to my fellow mates when it is needed" to "I would offer my skills in sports, academic work, or social issues to my fellow mates when needed"


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