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I hated writing with a passion - UF Admissions Essay



registered99 1 / 1  
Oct 26, 2008   #1
Hey, could you give me some feedback on this essay? The limit is 4000 characters.
Thanks

Describe a meaningful event, experience or accomplishment in your life and how it will affect your college experience or your contribution to the UF campus community. You may want to reflect on your family, your school or community activities, or your involvement in areas outside of school.

Before middle school, I hated writing with a passion. Any writing assignment, no matter how small or insignificant,
triggered an outburst of disdain. Then, when I entered middle school, I was taken under the teachings of Mrs. Edlund. This English teacher slowly moved me away from my strong, baseless opinions.

At first, my free-writing journals were filled with undescriptive rubbish, and the random, "i hate writing", thrown in. Before the end of my 7th grade year, I was writing genuinely out of my thoughts. I did not have to force myself to think about something to get it on paper. Eventually, I wrote out of my own free will. When I left middle school, I left with the feeling that I wanted to improve writing, and take myself to another level. Now that I am leaving high school this year, I have a similar attitude. When I entered high school, I felt as though I had chances to improve myself. To me, the constant drive for improvement benefits anybody. I feel I can reach new, unexplored depths in education. As I currently lack in teaching skills, UF might even be able to develop those so that I can help others learn.

EF_Team5 - / 1583  
Oct 27, 2008   #2
Great job here. You describe your event in a good amount of detail, and then discuss what you want to work on and how you want to use those skills on campus. Nice work.
galvarez - / 1  
Oct 28, 2008   #3
In my opinion, it is wayyyy too short. The word count should be between 400-500 and you're at 201. Plus you only have 1000+ characters when it should be closer to 3500. The moderators here check for grammar, but you really have to delve to make it longer. Be more specific, add more details, etc.

However, what you do have is written very well and that is a plus.
OP registered99 1 / 1  
Apr 21, 2010   #4
Thanks,
Used this essay verbatim and was granted Entry

Regards


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