Hello, I need some help with my UT essay, especially in grammar and the use of words. Also it is too long for an undergraduate essay, but I don't know which part should I cut. Your advice is appreciated very much.
Topic: Choose an issue of importance to you - the issue could be personal, school related, local, political, or international in scope - and write an essay in which you explain the significance of that issue to yourself, your family, your community, or your generation.
It is my second time standing in the hall of Peking University National Model United Nation Conference. As the leader of our school team, as well as the delegate for English in SC, I understand that there will be fierce argument again. But I am totally confident and exiting, because I am fully prepared, and I know how to be the best delegate.
One year ago, when I first tried to take part in this PKUNMUN, I totally didn't know what exactly it was. I just know that it has been in China for only several years, and the PKUNMUN was the biggest MUN. I thought it was just like a combination of speech and debate which I was very familiar with, so I could just do it like I have done in before. For fun, though first I thought, I did not expect that it would be so competitive and serious. Being chosen from 200 candidates in school to be one of the 13 competitors for the PKUNMUN, it was truly a difficult procedure. Not to mention I entered for SC, in which we didn't have a specific topic, only crisis and unexpectable conditions happened often. We should react quickly to solve all the problems.
I was still confident because I was good at history and international situations. The argument of the round competition began, I was about to bring into play, and I started to pour out forceful words, when suddenly I found out; this conference was totally unlike my imagination. Everyone here had different standpoints, and there seemed no right or wrong. And all of the students were the smartest ones, my splendid words had nothing to do with them. The beginning of the argument was a mass. So, just like a football team with all the stars composing members, the result might not be better than a non-star, long-time cooperated team, we failed in reach a conclusion at the first phase of it. I now understand why it was difficult for UN to make a decision. Most important, I found myself in a whole new type of activity. In the activity before, I 'v always been the leader, and my job is to organize and set a solid goal and give support. But now, no company, no applause, only different interest, how can I move on?
We started to discuss after the first failure. I realized that it was not a debate that only with positive and negative position. Even as a model, it was more sophisticated. We were not G8, not APEC, not even NATO, we were a huge organization, with tremendous diversity, and things couldn't work if we kept sticking to one ideal conclusion. Simple debate will not lead us to a result.
I meditated on figuring out what was going on here. In one hand, everybody was competitive rival, then how was I supposed to win if I was alone? In the other hand, though everybody has different interest, we all wanted to cooperated, then why we still failed to eliminate the conflict? Suddenly it brought me to another question: why did we focus on eliminating the conflict? The truth was that nothing we can do to deny the difference. If we try to seek a complete agreement, we wouldn't have peace and development. We were actually all involved in the globalization, what we need was long term cooperation, not just an end to this conference. I finally found out the solution: to increase understanding, to seek common ground while reserving difference; as well as the meaning of MUN: to learn the ability to work with other elite under the complicated situation, with conflict and cooperation, collision and harmonization existing together. Thanks to this activity that guide me to see the true imperfect world and society. My awareness helped me pass the round competition, and then I was chosen for the final and awarded the best delegate. Soon I was elected to be the leader of the MUN association in high school. As an important supporter, I took the responsibility of training and guiding the members for the next MUN conference.
Back to the hall in Beijing University, I have already had a big picture in my mind. Now matter how sophisticated the situation is, or how competitive other delegates are, all I have to do is to follow my principle, and go easy with the argument. In the end I am awarded the best delegate again as I wished. I believe that I will sweep all before one when I truly understand the wisdom of dealing with conflict and cooperation. Not only for MUN or international politics, But for whatever I do. To approve others and try to be approved, to benefit others as well as myself, I learn the way of keeping balance of each other, this wisdom makes me never be alone or weak. I will remember this tightly in my mind in the future endeavors.
Topic: Choose an issue of importance to you - the issue could be personal, school related, local, political, or international in scope - and write an essay in which you explain the significance of that issue to yourself, your family, your community, or your generation.
It is my second time standing in the hall of Peking University National Model United Nation Conference. As the leader of our school team, as well as the delegate for English in SC, I understand that there will be fierce argument again. But I am totally confident and exiting, because I am fully prepared, and I know how to be the best delegate.
One year ago, when I first tried to take part in this PKUNMUN, I totally didn't know what exactly it was. I just know that it has been in China for only several years, and the PKUNMUN was the biggest MUN. I thought it was just like a combination of speech and debate which I was very familiar with, so I could just do it like I have done in before. For fun, though first I thought, I did not expect that it would be so competitive and serious. Being chosen from 200 candidates in school to be one of the 13 competitors for the PKUNMUN, it was truly a difficult procedure. Not to mention I entered for SC, in which we didn't have a specific topic, only crisis and unexpectable conditions happened often. We should react quickly to solve all the problems.
I was still confident because I was good at history and international situations. The argument of the round competition began, I was about to bring into play, and I started to pour out forceful words, when suddenly I found out; this conference was totally unlike my imagination. Everyone here had different standpoints, and there seemed no right or wrong. And all of the students were the smartest ones, my splendid words had nothing to do with them. The beginning of the argument was a mass. So, just like a football team with all the stars composing members, the result might not be better than a non-star, long-time cooperated team, we failed in reach a conclusion at the first phase of it. I now understand why it was difficult for UN to make a decision. Most important, I found myself in a whole new type of activity. In the activity before, I 'v always been the leader, and my job is to organize and set a solid goal and give support. But now, no company, no applause, only different interest, how can I move on?
We started to discuss after the first failure. I realized that it was not a debate that only with positive and negative position. Even as a model, it was more sophisticated. We were not G8, not APEC, not even NATO, we were a huge organization, with tremendous diversity, and things couldn't work if we kept sticking to one ideal conclusion. Simple debate will not lead us to a result.
I meditated on figuring out what was going on here. In one hand, everybody was competitive rival, then how was I supposed to win if I was alone? In the other hand, though everybody has different interest, we all wanted to cooperated, then why we still failed to eliminate the conflict? Suddenly it brought me to another question: why did we focus on eliminating the conflict? The truth was that nothing we can do to deny the difference. If we try to seek a complete agreement, we wouldn't have peace and development. We were actually all involved in the globalization, what we need was long term cooperation, not just an end to this conference. I finally found out the solution: to increase understanding, to seek common ground while reserving difference; as well as the meaning of MUN: to learn the ability to work with other elite under the complicated situation, with conflict and cooperation, collision and harmonization existing together. Thanks to this activity that guide me to see the true imperfect world and society. My awareness helped me pass the round competition, and then I was chosen for the final and awarded the best delegate. Soon I was elected to be the leader of the MUN association in high school. As an important supporter, I took the responsibility of training and guiding the members for the next MUN conference.
Back to the hall in Beijing University, I have already had a big picture in my mind. Now matter how sophisticated the situation is, or how competitive other delegates are, all I have to do is to follow my principle, and go easy with the argument. In the end I am awarded the best delegate again as I wished. I believe that I will sweep all before one when I truly understand the wisdom of dealing with conflict and cooperation. Not only for MUN or international politics, But for whatever I do. To approve others and try to be approved, to benefit others as well as myself, I learn the way of keeping balance of each other, this wisdom makes me never be alone or weak. I will remember this tightly in my mind in the future endeavors.