Hi!
If your reading this, i invite you to help me out, provide any type of feedback (ideas, structure, grammar)
Describe two or three of your current intellectual interests and why they are exciting to you. Why will Cornell's College of Arts and Sciences be the right environment in which to pursue your interests? (Please limit your response to 650 words.)
Without expecting it, the pieces have fallen right into their place. Its seemingly interesting how a child`s passion for nature and fixation for science would ultimately lead him to incline towards economics.
As a child i was constantly fascinated with both natural and artificial creations. It was this unfiltered, innocent curiosity what drove me as a child to sketch the homogenous environment that is now embodied in my notebooks. You see, this fondness for knowledge wasn't a destination but a way of seeing the world.
My peculiar sense of perception allowed me to set a quest to understand the universe. And thats how it all began.
I remember my first year in middle school, I promised my 6th grade English teacher that i would one day create a new sort of energy to power the world with no repercussions whatsoever. We both signed this promise. Two weeks later i would step back into her office with a diagram of how counteracting electromagnetic forces could match at a high speed and produce thrust.
Naturally my interest in physics vanished with time, however i had already found a new one. Biology, i questioned myself, is it possible that plants growth can be determined by the emotional environment surrounding them? I quickly put myself to work and over a course of one month, i had proven that seedlings grew better with classical music than with any other.
And thats how my first years came across, jumping from one topic in one specific field to another in a complete different field.
However, It wasn't until i actually hit puberty when the focus of my activities narrowed down. I started to discover a whole science named psychology and the studies of collective behaviour, sociology. I now wanted to understand how people think and why they think the way they do.
Regardless of the conclusions i reached, i believe the most important one, was the conclusion set upon myself. I learned I am altruistic in nature. I now know that the attempts to replicate and figure out the world`s shifting gears had an even greater meaning behind them.
Simultaneously, during my first years of high school i not only excelled academically in the arts and sciences, but started to develop a fond for expression of ideals. I enrolled in the Model United Nations program, and became comfortable, as there weren't guidelines to follow or frames that limited my thinking. And this became the beginning of a discovery, hence a new chapter.
I founded "Movimiento MX" two years ago. A democratic internet platform where problems become public and real discussions lead to actual solutions. An agenda established by the people and for the people.
My quest for knowledge had set new boundaries. I started to become concerned about governmental affairs in my country and around the world. Politics and economics became my new fixation, and what is in my opinion the best way to face global issues.
There is tendency in latin american countries for politicians to have a background in law. This is a trend that can be correlated to the underdevelopment seen in these nations.
Endless dogmatic discussions. Debate over issues for the sake of debating. Solving problems only by changing the law or creating new ones. This has ultimately led to the reinvention of the country`s institutions every presidential period.
Politicians need to stop approaching problems from a legal perspective and start providing the according solution. And that`s what exactly what economics teaches you to do.
As a future policy maker i believe Cornell will provide me with these tools, not only because of their highly acclaimed Economics program but because Cornell believes in a liberal education, that combines contrasting doctrines to impact society. Thus, establishing a perfect match for a person of open interests such as myself
These are all suggestions, you will end up deciding how you think it sounds better.
"Its seemingly interesting how a child`s passion for nature and fixation for science would ultimately lead him to incline towards economics"
-Its should be it's and in fact i would seperate it to "it is" because you should avoid contractions for essays
-This may be just personal preference but I would say "lead him towards economics" or "make him incline towards economics"
-in the 2nd paragraph i would take out the 2nd instance of "as a child"
-3rd paragraph: thats-> that's, but I don't know if the contraction is correct there or not
- I started to discover a whole science named psychology and the studies of collective behaviour and sociology.
"Regardless of the conclusions i reached, i believe the most important one, was the conclusion set upon myself. I learned I am altruistic in nature."
-Connect the two phrases, a colon would work nicely here. In fact, maybe you could connect all three sentences
"Endless dogmatic discussions."
Try to avoid sentence fragments like this, find a way to connect the phrases.
To finalize, the general idea is very solid but I have two things to say:
1) very minor error: try not to confuse the accent (') with the apostrophe ('), just a few instances where you do that.
2) ask yourself, you're trying to get into cornell (me too :D) and write about cornell specifically, so: if you replace all instances of "Cornell" with any other Institution, would the essay still make perfect sense? If so, try to be more specific towards Cornell
I hope I helped, it's like 4 am here.
Good luck!! I hope that we meet next year in Cornell :)
