My interest in computers ; Duke Sup-Engineering/ Why Duke?

Hey I was wondering if anyone could give me some tips on my supplement essay. Any advice would be nice !
Question- If you are applying to the Pratt School of Engineering, please discuss why you want to study engineering and why you would like to study at Duke.

My interest in computers has ranged back several years. It first started one day when my mother bought home a computer handbook that described the different kinds of computer languages used to build programs. I was fascinated by how the smallest line modification in a code could basically stop a whole program from running. I loved that every language had a different component and when put together they made a computer run as smoothly as ever. When I think about my future and what I want to study I think of computer engineering, a career choice that I am deeply interested in and something that fascinates me. After doing my research as well, I know for a fact that I want to study Computer Engineering at Duke University. In addition to Duke having an excellent engineering program, I want to go into the field and hopefully revolutionize the technological world.

One of the things that stand out the most to me at Duke is the amount of opportunities to participate in internships as a freshman. I would like to work with IBM, and gain the experience of how my future job will be. Both my father and mother work in excellent job atmospheres, but I believe that there is more experience to gain. During my time at the internship I will pick up on all sorts of knacks and tricks to becoming successful. This is something that I will work hard at and hopefully after graduating college I will have a job opportunity waiting for me. My goal as a computer engineering is to not only become successful, but to do something I am passionate and interested in.

I believe Duke is the perfect university fit for me. From the strength of the engineering program to the opportunities' that many of the students have, Duke would definitely help me develop my talent and develop my interests inside and outside of Duke. I also like the opportunity of having a major and minor. Aside from my major, I would love to minor in business and potentially open up my own computer shop in the near future. It would be a pretty good experience working at a major company before opening my own business. Between the engineering program and the chance to better myself, I believe Duke would be a good school because I will be able to grow as a better person overall.

I would try and rewrite the first paragraph to make it flow better, use some semi colons and connect sentences/hybrid them

Needs a lot of work.
"During my time at the internship I will pick up on all sorts of knacks and tricks to becoming successful." ----- Be more specific. Be successful in what? elaborate

----I believe Duke University if the perfect fit for me.

----- It would be a unforgettable experience working at a major company before opening my own business.
------- Between the engineering program and the chance to better myself, I KNOW Duke is THE IDEAL COLLEGE FOR ME because I will be able to grow as a better person overall."