"internships or a strong neuroscience major": Short Boston University

In December of my freshman year, I came upon a yellow sticky note jutting out of Peterson's Four-Year Colleges 2008. The page revealed a college none other than Boston University, a school that my mother tenaciously urges me to attend. Over the next few years, I've glimpsed around your website, but what really caught my attention were the student made videos on Youtube showing the ins and outs of BU. After BU whetted my desire for a grand college experience, I decided to peruse through BU's handbooks fresh from delivery to see if there are opportunities for internships or a strong neuroscience major - a big success. Now every time I visit Boston for a dentist appointment, I would look for the catalyst of my future: Boston University.

Would anyone please check this over?

You need to post the prompt or else it makes it hard to proofread your essay. I can't really help you with improving your essay other than grammatical help.

I came upon a yellow sticky note jutting out of Peterson's Four-Year Colleges 2008.

The first time I read this, I was super confused. Then I re-read it and realized it was a book. This is a confusing way of saying you found a bookmark that lead you to this college. Instead try and say something like: I came upon a yellow sticky not jutting out of a college-guide book I was flipping through . I am sure you can find a better way to say this, its just a general idea.

You need to go back and work on your switching between tenses. Here are some examples of the sentence switching tenses in your essay:

The page revealed a college none other than Boston University (past) , a school that my mother tenaciously urges me to attend (present) .

Over the next few years, I've glimpsed around your website, but what really caught my attention were the student made videos on Youtube showing the ins and outs of BU.

I am a bit confused about your conclusion where you say something about a dentist institution and the Boston University? Try and make that clearer for the reader.

I strongly suggest you revise this. Work on making your sentences flow from one to the other, and over all making your ideas clearer.

Yes, this was bad. I gonna completely get rid of it. There's no need for anyone to edit it anymore.