Hello, I need help with my Personal Statement ( to transfer to VCU) I had one written but the College Writing Center Lady said it was too Personal. She said write more about VCU so I tried to work that in there but it is like two different essays. Can you give me some direction
Essay 250-300 words Tell us about yourself and why you want to go to VCU
When I was a senior in high school I received an open house invitation to Virginia Commonwealth University it was the only school I had ever wanted to attend but I was too afraid to apply. Over the years I collected many VCU brochures at various transfer fairs and college information seminars soon they became less of a tool for success and more a reminder of my shortcomings. The depression I fell into led me to discover a fruitful sense of self. The first step I had to take in my journey to happiness was fleeing from a toxic relationship. In this union I was the abused and the abuser. I hurt myself with a sharp tongue and defaming words like loser, failure, useless, weak, and broken. I was convinced the world could see my lack so I wore these verses as skin but they were brittle and offer little protection. Eventually we must learn the universe does not coddle a shrinking violet. We learn humbling ourselves to a point of dysfunction is not only a disservice to us but the world. Denying the wonderment of our being is submitting to a falsehood. I found that I was strong and beautiful. The best thing about this understanding is convincing others of their worth. I am wake with the realization that nothing is being done to me but instead for my benefit. Experiences I was once ashamed of have become beautiful tools to help me flourish. I am no longer afraid to leap for fear no one will catch me but I am confident in my ability not only to stand on my own two feet but thrive.
Essay 250-300 words Tell us about yourself and why you want to go to VCU
When I was a senior in high school I received an open house invitation to Virginia Commonwealth University it was the only school I had ever wanted to attend but I was too afraid to apply. Over the years I collected many VCU brochures at various transfer fairs and college information seminars soon they became less of a tool for success and more a reminder of my shortcomings. The depression I fell into led me to discover a fruitful sense of self. The first step I had to take in my journey to happiness was fleeing from a toxic relationship. In this union I was the abused and the abuser. I hurt myself with a sharp tongue and defaming words like loser, failure, useless, weak, and broken. I was convinced the world could see my lack so I wore these verses as skin but they were brittle and offer little protection. Eventually we must learn the universe does not coddle a shrinking violet. We learn humbling ourselves to a point of dysfunction is not only a disservice to us but the world. Denying the wonderment of our being is submitting to a falsehood. I found that I was strong and beautiful. The best thing about this understanding is convincing others of their worth. I am wake with the realization that nothing is being done to me but instead for my benefit. Experiences I was once ashamed of have become beautiful tools to help me flourish. I am no longer afraid to leap for fear no one will catch me but I am confident in my ability not only to stand on my own two feet but thrive.
