'Judo teacher ' - school or summer activity

In the space available discuss the significance to you of the in which you have been most involved.

Please correct my grammar mistakes and also the idea of the essay.

Any suggestions or comments are welcome. Thanks very much
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"Hajime! The game is on. Use your legs, hands, hip and shoulder. Focus. Combine your movements. Drop your partner. Trap her. Hold as tight as you can. Matte! Next pair please!" "Remember our rule: throw and drop your partners with whole strength. Otherwise, your partners will be badly hurt."

The very same reminder my Judo teacher keeps repeating in each of our lessons. Judo is not about fighting techniques. It is about the spirit. Judo is an art, a combination between the mind and the body, between both weak and strong. Contempt would never be allowed in class. We learned to be diligent, determined, but also to respect our partners.

If we want to be successful, we must co-operate with our partners. Judo is a very sensitive sport. We need to pay attention to all our movements, our positions, and our strengths. Once our partners do wrong we need to tell them. We need to show them what we feel when their positions are not correct. If we do not do that, we may get dangerous injuries. This is what we enjoy about Judo. This is how new friendships are built.

At first I and my seven other classmates signed up for Judo class. After signing up, I had once wanted to quit the class before it even started. I was afraid that it was too violent. I was afraid that I would get hurt. I was afraid that there would be no way to withdraw when I was in. However, it would be wasteful for not joining that one-and-only class since my school was the only high school in the city that had a Judo room right on campus so I decided to take part in it. Two years later, I was the only one in my class signed up for Judo despite I would not have a partner to pratice with me, despite the busy schedule of the last year in high school. I found the only girl in the next door class signing up for Judo class. As the result, we were the only two girls in the class.

I am very proud of what I did. I am pleased because I made the right decision that I chose to follow my preference.

I liked the introduction although I think that you should explore more, but the body and conclusion are very interesting

I hope it helps you :)

Try to show your emotions, not tell it. But overall your essay is very interesting.

Your essay is interesting, but try to write in a way that the reader will feel your emotion and not just be reading about it..

Could you please look at my essay, my deadline is approaching, thank you.

Very interesting. Use more imagery to show emotions.

thank you very much. Anyway, the deadline is passed. I'll try my best to help you.