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During my junior year in high school, I volunteered at an orphanage to teach English to the children



atothez1000 2 / 3  
Dec 17, 2014   #1
Prompt: Reflect on a time when you challenged a belief or idea. What prompted you to act? Would you make the same decision again?

During my junior year in high school, I volunteered at an orphanage to teach English to the children and assist the organization in its day-to-day operation. I loved the job and also the children. Even the smallest of affection I showed them replaced the heart sinking frown they had on their faces with a wide and spiritually fulfilling smile. However, my experience at the orphanage was not all rosy, as I also had the opportunity to observe first-hand the orphanage's flawed practices.

The story begins when I decided to donate some of my possessions to the children after volunteering for a few weeks at the orphanage. I brought clean cloths, bag packs, books, and my childhood's most beloved possession - my keyboard piano. As I entered the Administration Office to give my donations, I noticed a pile of old clothes and toys lying at the left side of the room and a large cupboard filled with relatively newer items on the right. I handed my donations to the social worker at the office, who took a quick but absorbed look at the items before putting them in the cupboard. When I asked if I could give my donations to the children right away, he replied, "Do not worry. We will give it to them later. For now, why don't you grab some stuff from that pile and take it to the children?"

I returned to the organization the next day excited to teach the children how to play the piano. To my surprise, however, I found out that the children did not receive any of the items I had donated. Bewildered and confused, I went to the Administration Office to speak with the social worker. I noticed that the piano was still in the cupboard, but almost half of the other items that were in the cupboard the previous day, including the clothes I had donated, were missing. I waited until the social worker returned and asked him what they normally keep in the cupboard. He told me that they keep some of the newer and better quality donations in the cupboard while others are kept in the pile on the other side of the room. At that point, I suspiciously asked, "The cupboard looks emptier than yesterday. Where did all the stuff go?" With a bit of discomfort and hesitation, the social worker mentioned that one of his coworkers took some of the donations home because she wanted some toys for her son's birthday party.

As soon as I understood that the employees were taking the donations that were of good quality, I told the social worker that the practice was morally wrong and that it amounts to stealing from the children. In an attempt to justify the practice, the social worker expressed his belief that good quality donations would only cause jealousy and fights among the kids. After my futile attempts to convince the social worker, I realized that I needed to report this matter, and I filed a complaint to the management. However, no one responded to me, and whenever I tried to bring up the issue, I would get a simple "later" response.

Sadly, I had to accept the fact that what was immoral to me was apparently business as usual at the organization. I also had to accept the truth that someone at my level, a volunteer, does not have the power to create a change at an organizational level. Despite the fact that I felt powerless and defeated at the end, I do not regret my actions and I would still make the same decision again. After all, I believe it is our responsibility to act if we see unjust or unfair practices in our society, and I hope to equip myself with education to better challenge such unfair practices in the future.

melissae 5 / 11  
Dec 18, 2014   #2
I also had to accept the truth that someone at my level, a volunteer, does not have the power to create a change at an organizational level

I feel like this sentence does not shed a positive light on you. It seems as if you just gave up in your fight and simply felt as if there was nothing you could do. Maybe focus your ending on you realized all of the injustices in the world and will continue to fight for those who can not.
vangiespen - / 4077  
Dec 19, 2014   #3
Adonay, it is unfortunate that the final act that you chose to take in this particularly compelling and quite controversial case was silence and acceptance. That is not the kind of attitude that is received well by the admissions officer. You chose to be subservient and submit to what you know was a wrong act on the part of the social workers rather than standing up to them, challenging their authority, and doing something to make sure that the donations reach the children in the proper manner each and every time a donation is made.

I strongly advice that you do not use this essay for prompt. It will definitely weaken you application. You need to show a strong personality in this essay. One that stands up to authority when authority is wrong, fights for what he or she knows to be right, and offers a successful solution to the situation you found yourself in. Sadly, this essay does nothing of the sort for you. It presents a weak personality that may not be able to stand up to the rigors and politics of university life. Change the essay to a thought , idea, or concept that you successfully challenged instead. Even something as simple as your curfew at home would be a good topic for this prompt. Just don't use this topic. It is not good for your application.


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