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As a leader, you need to work with your team and lead by example. Personal Profile

Vincent123 1 / -  
Jan 26, 2016   #1
Please edit or leave a comment, thank you.

Explain how you responded to a problem and/or an unfamiliar situation. What did you do, what was the outcome, and what did you learn from the experience? (maximum 200 words)

Being a member of the Animal Rescue Club, I was asked to lead a fundraising activity that involved seeking aid from bigger firms and prominent people. This was the first time the exercise was to be carried out, I delegated the duties to the members to save on time and hasten the process. In moving around, I arranged a meeting with the contributors in the area. During the meeting with the contributors, I was nervous as I expected, but I challenged myself to speak up as my team would set me as a role model. The fundraising activity was a success and the money raised was used to aid to a needy charity that was in a crisis.

This experience taught me that, as a leader, you need to work with your team and lead by example. Co-ordination among your team members is also paramount and proportional to the result you expect.
vangiespen - / 4,134 1449  
Jan 26, 2016   #2
Vincent, you are rehashing a response from a previous essay that was written for a different prompt. The evidence can be seen in the way that the process involved in the events is all mixed up and unrelated. In fact, you did not even change the portions that I wrote specifically for the previous essay. That is what made this a non-applicable response to this prompt.

If you are using this to apply at a different university, you have to consider writing about a new topic because you could get caught plagiarizing yourself. If it is for the same university, then you should know that admissions officers do not take kindly to students who cannot offer new responses for different prompts that their university provides either. Rehashed answers send the message that you are not taking your application seriously.

So I am going to give you a chance to either change the whole essay or explain to me why you should still be allowed to use the same answer for a different prompt. Either way, I feel that you will need to revise the whole statement in order to make it more prompt responsive and most of all, avoid plagiarizing yourself.

Home / Undergraduate / As a leader, you need to work with your team and lead by example. Personal Profile
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