Leap of faith to Rice University - What motivated you to apply to Rice University?

What motivated you to apply to Rice University? Please be specific and limit your response to 200 words.

My road of continuing school in America up to the process of applying to universities as a transfer student has been revolutionary. In elementary school I remember attending summer school yet again, in middle school I hurdle out of ESL classes and having heard of the word college but knowing nothing else of the college world, I glided through high school. As I faltered upon clues about how to navigate through community college and as I experimented with various paths, every step enlightened me upon who am I, what do I want and unearthed a passion for higher education. Just as I endeavor a traditional college experience, I want a path where I can step at the edge of my precipice and construct higher ground to amplify my world. I aspire to integrate to a circle where diversity, intellectual interest and involvement are celebrated and are the epicenters for growth and discovery. Upon graduating from a community, I want confidence that my education, my work and hands-on experience will allow me to undertake projects that improve a village or a city. The environment and the approach towards education at Rice is what I look for to continue my revolution.

What do you mean by continuing school ? That's not clear :(


This sentence too sounds confusing. You have too many ideas in one line and it's hard for the reader to have your ideas connected. I suggest you to re-phrase both these lines. If I can understand your idea, I could have given my suggestion for those too lines. But I really can't catch your ideas :(

This essay says a lot about why you want to go to a college, but it doesn't say enough about why you want to go to Rice. Of the thousands of colleges in America, what made you pick it? What are you interested in studying there? What kinds of clubs or opportunities does it have that you are interested in? Every college has diversity and intellectual interest.

One more try!! :) thanks for everyone's time!

What motivated you to apply to Rice University? Please be specific and limit your response to 200 words

Community College was the only road I knew about after high school and so I took it. As I discovered the college world by taking seminar courses, speaking to counselors and experimenting with various paths, every step I took enlightened me upon my goals and unearthed a passion for higher education. While I endeavor a traditional college experience of social interactions and valuable education, I also seek a path where I can step at the edge of my precipice and construct higher ground to amplify my world. Rice offers this possibility to students due to the intimate class size and the interactions with outstanding researchers and thinkers in and outside of class. Although I am acquainted with faculty and I participated in clubs in my college, the community on campus is tenuous. The great portion of out-of-state student and the large student body living on campus meet my aspirations to integrate into a circle where student involvement and diversity are strong and celebrated. My ultimate goal is to graduate from a community feeling confident that I can undertake engineering projects, I have no doubt that students leave mastering various intellectual interests due to the hands on experience and the high volume of research that thrives in Rice.