Unanswered [5] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width   Posts: 9


I have always loved the arts and sciences; How Duke attracts you?



MHKHRY 5 / 21  
Dec 19, 2012   #1
(For Arts and Sciences Applicants Only) If you are applying to Trinity College of Arts and Sciences, please discuss why you consider Duke a good match for you. Is there something in particular at Duke that attracts you? Please limit your response to one or two paragraphs.

To upload a document in response to this question, please click the 'upload' button below. If your upload is successful, you will see a 'view document' button and a 'delete' button appear next to the question.

For as long as I can remember I have always loved the arts and sciences. My parents nurtured my interests by exposing me to certain resources, such as the l'Ouvre Museum in France and the Vatican Museum in Rome. I have never been more amazed by the beauty and grandeur of such establishments. Thus, I began integrating myself in these subjects too. I have been playing piano for about twelve years now, and I participate in several recitals. Drawing is also a relevant part in my life. Mrs. Protano, my elementary school art teacher encouraged my interest in drawing. As a result, in 2006, my drawing was recognized at the Student Art Exhibit of the Broward Public Schools. Furthermore, the arts helped me through some distressing times, including the recent loss of my aunt Manouchka and my mentor Floyd. I am also a member of a myriad of clubs at my school, such as the competitive National Science Honors Society, the Environmental Club, and SECME (a science engineering club). It is fantastic that Duke offers internships to students, a chance that the majority of other competitive schools don't offer, in order for them to experience their desired careers first-hand. I am one of those aspiring potential students who has a thirst for knowledge and an incentive to benefit society.

ah_zafari [Contributor] 40 / 661  
Dec 20, 2012   #2
I have always been interested inloved the arts and sciences("science is an uncountable noun. Do not use it in plural form. You can use this noun as a countable noun when you are talking about a particular part of science, eg. mathematical sciences. ) .

twelve12 (write the numbers over 10 in digits) years now and Iparticipating in several recitals (the structure of the sentence before and after "and" must be the same)

Drawing is also a relevant part in my life.

Revise this sentence. I now what you mean, but it would be better if you mention it more clearly.

Furthermore, the arts helped me through some distressing times, including the recent loss of my aunt Manouchka and my mentor Floyd.

How??

The prompt asked you to write why you chose Duke and why you think this place is perfectly match for you. You wrote seven lines about your interests and only two lines about Duke and what the prompt asked. Try to connect your interests to Duke and the facilities and the opportunities that it provides for students.

hope this helps
Regards
Ahmad
dumi 1 / 6793  
Dec 20, 2012   #3
Hi,
I think the following is a better point to start your answer(the part in bold);

My parents nurtured my interests by exposing me to certain resources, such as the l'Ouvre Museum in France and the Vatican Museum in Rome.I have never been more amazed by the beauty and grandeur of such establishments.

Begin your essay with your experience; tell them how amazed you were with their spectacular presentations1
You need to start your essay with a punch! They, the admission panel, must remember your application amidst hundreds of others. : )
rocky432 2 / 7  
Dec 20, 2012   #4
Hi,

i think you have nicely presented your interest in the opening line. However, the prompt ask you why Duke a good match? you still have not answered that. I suggest you to focus on a particular interest and relate it to duke instead of mentioning all your talent. Surely the admission officer would be able to view it in your rest of the application.

Good luck
OP MHKHRY 5 / 21  
Dec 20, 2012   #5
Rare Opportunity; Trinity College of Arts and Science at Duke/ Why consider Duke?

(For Arts and Sciences Applicants Only) If you are applying to Trinity College of Arts and Science, please discuss why you consider Duke a good match for you. Is there something in particular at Duke that attracts you? Please limit your response to one or two paragraphs.

To upload a document in response to this question, please click the 'upload' button below. If your upload is successful, you will see a 'view document' button and a 'delete' button appear next to the question.

I have never been more amazed by the beauty and grandeur of such establishments as the l'Ouvre Museum in France and the Vatican Museum in Rome. As my mother held my small hands, we walked into these massive buildings, invigorated and in wonderment as we admired the paintings and sculptures of Da Vinci, Michelangelo, Raphael, etc. For as long as I can remember I have always been interested in the arts and science. Drawing has become a relevant part in my life now; whenever I draw, I am transported to a serene state of mind. Mrs. Protano, my elementary school art teacher encouraged my interest in drawing. As a result, in 2006, one of my drawings was recognized at the Student Art Exhibit of the Broward Public Schools. I have been playing piano for about 12 years now too, and participating in several recitals; much like drawing, I am able to express myself through my music. Furthermore, the arts helped me through some distressing times, including the recent loss of my aunt Manouchka and my piano mentor, Floyd. These two harrowing events left me feeling weak and depressed, the arts help numb me to the pain. Science is also a way for me to express my ingenuity. I am a member of a myriad of clubs at my school, such as the competitive National Science Honors Society, the Environmental Club, and SECME. These clubs have helped teach me the importance of communicating with others in order to build up a greater cause, such as saving our habitats and educating the populous on important issues. It is fantastic that Duke offers internships to students, a chance that the majority of other competitive schools don't offer, in order for them to experience their desired careers first-hand. I am attracted to Duke by this rare opportunity, especially because of the focus towards science. Furthermore, the effort and time spent in research and education is noteworthy, I am one of those aspiring potential students who have a thirst for knowledge and an incentive to benefit society, ready to educate the masses.
nairbear68 6 / 29  
Dec 20, 2012   #6
wow, i'm also applying to duke! we have many things in common regarding apps lol

in wonderment

should be just "in wonder" or "awed"

Da Vinci, Michelangelo, Raphael, etc

For as long as I can remember

i have read other applicants to dukes' essays, and theirs were much longer. you might want to add another paragraph more about Duke bc that is actually what the prompt is asking you. i feel like i read a what are your interests essay instead of why duke essay.
OP MHKHRY 5 / 21  
Dec 20, 2012   #7
Thanks! I'll fix it, and good luck on your application to :)
DrS 1 / 24  
Dec 23, 2012   #8
Your response says NOTHING about Duke.
The prompt is ABOUT DUKE, NOT YOU.
jangirashok 3 / 8  
Dec 23, 2012   #9
MHKHRY
Its more like Are you a good fit for DUKE... Not what they asked you... You should describe their features which are helpful for your goal. Don't concentrate on your achievements instead use them to make DUKE as a perfect fit for you and concentrate on DUKE rather.


Home / Undergraduate / I have always loved the arts and sciences; How Duke attracts you?
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳