I'm looking for last-minute corrections on my second UC essay. Any help at all is greatly appreciated! Thank you.
PROMPT: Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?
I took my first piano lesson at age five, mostly motivated to do so because my teacher was my god-brother, Ed, who was the most entertaining guy around. I was completely oblivious as to what the black and white keys meant and only hoped to learn a few tunes to amuse my parents. When Ed started the lesson by asking me where the C was, referring to the piano note, I pointed out the window in the direction I thought the literal sea was. Despite that somewhat inauspicious start, that 30-minute lesson marked the beginning of my long friendship with the universal language of music.
Throughout elementary school I began to actively enjoy piano more as my skills improved. I made up my own songs and sang along. I decided to pick up trumpet in the fifth grade, and used my talents to pick up other unusual instruments that interested me, such as the recorder and ukulele. Often, I would amuse my friends at church by playing popular songs on the piano. I explored a wide range of musical genres and was eager to share them with my parents or anyone who would listen.
Though music has provided me with a great source of entertainment, it also allowed other aspects of my personality to develop more fully. My musical skills have been put to good use in the worship team at church as well as at the nearby nursing home. Being around so many music-oriented people has further expanded my extroversion, as I'm now somewhat notorious on campus for randomly breaking out in song or dance. I aimed to try new things, which ended with varying degrees in success; I was able to make the county honor band on trumpet in my junior year, yet I also discovered I'm a terrible marimba player, as evidenced by my failed stint in the percussion section.
Like all good friends do, however, music and I have had our differences. There were many times when I regretted joining marching band because of the rehearsals in hot weather or the large time commitment. I took long breaks from piano lessons because the time commitments would interfere with my increasingly busy schedules. Despite these trials, music has given me so many opportunities and friendships that I can't imagine my life without it. To this day, I love making up songs to entertain both friends and strangers. Some of my closest friends are members of the band, and I've marched in parades that I never would have dreamed of participating in, such as the Macy's Parade. Though I don't plan to pursue music as a career, I am looking forward to joining on-campus music organizations and clubs. I can't wait to see what the future will hold as I grow in both my musical and personal skills.
PROMPT: Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?
I took my first piano lesson at age five, mostly motivated to do so because my teacher was my god-brother, Ed, who was the most entertaining guy around. I was completely oblivious as to what the black and white keys meant and only hoped to learn a few tunes to amuse my parents. When Ed started the lesson by asking me where the C was, referring to the piano note, I pointed out the window in the direction I thought the literal sea was. Despite that somewhat inauspicious start, that 30-minute lesson marked the beginning of my long friendship with the universal language of music.
Throughout elementary school I began to actively enjoy piano more as my skills improved. I made up my own songs and sang along. I decided to pick up trumpet in the fifth grade, and used my talents to pick up other unusual instruments that interested me, such as the recorder and ukulele. Often, I would amuse my friends at church by playing popular songs on the piano. I explored a wide range of musical genres and was eager to share them with my parents or anyone who would listen.
Though music has provided me with a great source of entertainment, it also allowed other aspects of my personality to develop more fully. My musical skills have been put to good use in the worship team at church as well as at the nearby nursing home. Being around so many music-oriented people has further expanded my extroversion, as I'm now somewhat notorious on campus for randomly breaking out in song or dance. I aimed to try new things, which ended with varying degrees in success; I was able to make the county honor band on trumpet in my junior year, yet I also discovered I'm a terrible marimba player, as evidenced by my failed stint in the percussion section.
Like all good friends do, however, music and I have had our differences. There were many times when I regretted joining marching band because of the rehearsals in hot weather or the large time commitment. I took long breaks from piano lessons because the time commitments would interfere with my increasingly busy schedules. Despite these trials, music has given me so many opportunities and friendships that I can't imagine my life without it. To this day, I love making up songs to entertain both friends and strangers. Some of my closest friends are members of the band, and I've marched in parades that I never would have dreamed of participating in, such as the Macy's Parade. Though I don't plan to pursue music as a career, I am looking forward to joining on-campus music organizations and clubs. I can't wait to see what the future will hold as I grow in both my musical and personal skills.