Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?
Growing up in a small town, you often find that you may have been living under a rock when it comes to the real world. I experienced this first hand as a freshman entering high school. Three Rivers, California doesn't have a high school of its own and the closest one is in Woodlake - about twenty five minutes away. Traveling this far for school would mean new students, teachers, and an unfamiliar environment. I would wake up in the morning and dread going to school. As a freshman, I would find excuses to skip school as much as possible. I received good grades but I hated this new experience. It was easier sophomore year as I would say to myself, "Okay, just three more years." Then I heard about the Assistance Service Dog Educational Center. The Dog Program, as we call it, selects eight lucky students to raise and train a service dog that will then be placed in the community to assist others. It is the only program of its kind that allows high school students to train the service dogs. I applied my sophomore year but there were about forty applications and only eight could be accepted. With my junior year approaching, I was determined to get into the program. I was ecstatic when it finally happened.
Donna and Gerald Whittaker are the founders of the Dog Program. In 2002, they formed a partnership between the Assistance Service Dog Educational Center and the Woodlake Union High School District. One purpose of the program is to sharpen the focus of students who are searching for their purpose in life by learning to help others through a canine training program. The dogs they train enrich the lives of people dealing with the daily challenges of life while living with their disabilities. Over a two year period, the dogs will learn over ninety commands that will assist others.
Out of the eight team members, each student is selected for their character, attributes, and resilience to participate in the program. The personality of the student is matched with the personality of a puppy. This match becomes a bond that becomes inseparable between man and man's best friend. The program started with the "A" team and every year will move down the alphabet. My team is the "F" team.
The "F" team has already experienced some terrible mishaps. Out of the first eight puppies we received, four of the puppies died from Parvo - a disease that is highly contagious for canines. This loss included my puppy. I was devastated, but the experience made our team stronger as we had to deal with it together. The members of my team were given an odd mix of new puppies. My puppy, which I named Falon, was a rambunctious, hyper little Airedale and Black Lab mix. She is full of spirit and strength and was going to be a lot to control. Donna Whitaker always told us that our dogs will take on our personalities and will demonstrate characteristics that resemble our own. If that's the case, then Falon must be my other half - my wild side.
Now that I am in the second year of the program, Falon had grown tremendously and has even calmed down - just a little. She knows all of her commands and is now perfecting them. I have come to realize that joining the program has been a great learning experience for me. It raised my awareness of other people and has helped me to have a better outlook on school and life. It has given me experience in 'parenthood' and I have learned to talk to large groups of people without getting nervous. I have made new friends and have had life changing experiences. The best possible thing that I will gain out of the Dog Program is that in just a few months my service dog will be a certified service dog that will assigned to someone that really needs her. I am excited by the fact that I have trained a dog that will be a positive, dramatic, life changing force in the life of another person.
The dog program sounds really cool. I have a few suggestions.
"Traveling this far for school would mean new students, teachers, and an unfamiliar environment. I would wake up in the morning and dread going to school. As a freshman, I would find excuses to skip school as much as possible."
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Take out the woulds and just make it past tense. You definitely have to do this in the sentence that starts with "Traveling".
I would also add more detail about how you found the program to create a smoother transition.
"The Dog Program, as we call it, selects eight lucky students to raise and train a service dog that will then be placed in the community to assist others. It is the only program of its kind that allows high school students to train the service dogs. I applied my sophomore year but there were about forty applications and only eight could be accepted. With my junior year approaching, I was determined to get into the program. I was ecstatic when it finally happened."
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No need to mention the number of applicants and spots available. Just say that you applied "to no avail" or something like that.
"Donna and Gerald Whittaker are the founders of the Dog Program. In 2002, they formed a partnership between the Assistance Service Dog Educational Center and the Woodlake Union High School District."
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This doesn't really fit into the essay very well, at least not where it's placed. I'd just not give the background information, as what is most important/interesting is what you do in the program.
That's all I've got. Also, it's probably a formatting issue, but you should edit this post and put spaces between the paragraphs. It makes it easier to read. Hopefully, there's still time left to edit.
This is really nice. You write with a noticeable kind of simple honesty.
I want to mention that those first few sentences, about having to travel to school, have nothing to do with the rest of the essay.
option #1: I think you should get rid of them, and give an intro related to the program and its significance for you.
option 2: Or you can keep that stuff about the town not having a school, and needing to travel to school, but then you have to find a way to talk about that again in the last paragraph.
