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'a new journey with bare feet' - U of m supplement



rlatjsdud 1 / -  
Oct 29, 2011   #1
Everyone belongs to many different communities and/or groups defined by (among other things)
shared geography, religion, ethnicity, income, cuisine, interest, race, ideology, or intellectual
heritage. Choose one of the communities to which you belong, and describe that community and your place within it. (Approximately 250 words)

Two years ago, I took off my shoes and embarked on a new journey with bare feet. Filled with both enthusiasm and anxieties, I stepped into the new world without any plans. Although I did not expect it to be an easy pathway, actually it was much more coarse than expected; the path was rather like a jungle full of exotic animals. Yes, here began my new stage in my life:

education in America as an international student.

Callouses started covering my feet whenever I faced quagmires called "language barrier" and predatory beasts called "culture" As time elapsed, the callouses covered my feet and I became oblivious of the shoes I always had worn. However, I grudgingly had to wear them again last year when my whole family immigrated to America.

As a part of an immigrant community, accommodating new life style has always been bitter; we felt isolation and despair. Especially, I was responsible for all house affairs. Whenever my brother or parents encountered problems, I had to safeguard my family from impasses. Sometimes I was tired of carrying all of the responsibilities. However, in the midst of the foreign

society, the only people I could rely on were my family because they had significant roles on
building my self-confidence and quality as a leader.

Despite knowing my lack of deep foresight, I somehow naturally became the temporary head of my household. With my eagerness to start a new path in college, I want to contribute my self-confidence to family, encouraging them to overcome difficulties.

kellylui 1 / 2  
Oct 30, 2011   #2
I think this is a genuine essay. I especially liked the first few paragraphs; but I think starting from this sentence:
However, in the midst of the foreign society, the only people I could rely on were my family because they had significant roles on building my self-confidence and quality as a leader.

--the focus seems to waver off a bit, and I cannot really get a clear grasp on what you are trying to say... I think if you can clarify the last few sentences and make your point clearly, this can be a well-written essay. Good luck!
brunogdiaz 1 / 2  
Oct 30, 2011   #3
One of my favorite extracurricular activities is tutoring sciences and mathematics. After attending my college courses, I spend my time in the library aiding those with poor comprehension of their science or mathematics courses. Helping those that have a difficult time with their academic courses is a very rewarding experience. Seeing them understand what they didn't understand makes me have a feeling of achievement. Sometimes, I may not know what the student happens to have trouble understanding. In that case, I do my best to learn and teach the students, making it easier for them. When this is not possible, bringing ideas to the table with the student is the best solution. To me, tutoring is a way of relearning that which I already know, as well as learning new and different approaches to different topics in these subjects. Through tutoring, I am able to interact with different students and improve my communication skills, while simultaneously learning different teaching methods.


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