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(new methods of thinking / journalism / Bohemian Rhapsody) - NYU


hanakml 2 / 19  
Dec 29, 2011   #1
Please be 100% honest. And I'll be happy to return the favor.

Prompt: Why NYU?

New York City: the city that never sleeps. New York University: the school that has prevented me from sleep. Ever since I can remember, NYU has been the only university I've wanted to attend, so much so that the mere idea of stepping onto its campus as a student has opened the door to a surfeit of thought-filled, sleepless nights. To me, NYU is the quintessential representation of what every corner of the globe should be about: diversity. I believe it is necessary to embrace and celebrate the fact that we're not cookie-cutter carbon copies of one another, and there is no better place to do so than NYU, where people from nearly all walks of life can be found. Growing up in a small, suburban town in the state of Georgia, ideas outside of the norm often carry heavy stigmas, which I have come to learn first-hand. I'm what most people would call the textbook definition of a skeptic. I doubt what shouldn't be doubted and I believe what shouldn't be believed. The thought of a twenty-ton slab of steel transporting hundreds of people through the air boggles my mind. The idea that every living organism is made of trillions of even tinier organisms leaves me scratching my head in perplexity. I look at things inside-out and upside-down, backwards and forwards, paying close attention to every minute detail. As a student at NYU, I would be able to further expose myself to fresh, new methods of thinking and viewing the world, while also bringing forth my own without the restraint of others.

Prompt: Regardless of whether or not you have an intended major or concentration, please elaborate on an academic area of interest and how you wish to explore it at NYU's campuses in New York or Abu Dhabi or at one of our global academic centers around the world. Please share any activities or experiences you have had that have cultivated your intellectual interests leading you to choose to study at the NYU campus of your choice.

A successful career in journalism cannot be obtained simply through long, sleepless nights of perusing through textbooks and memorizing facts, but instead through the physical dedication of getting up each morning to hit the streets and uncover the latest stories to share with the world. For this purpose, there is no other city in the world more thrilling than New York City. At the NYU campus in New York, the possibilities are endless in terms of jump starting a career as a journalist. From the quietest street corners to the hectic temperament of Times Square, there is never a dull moment in The Big Apple. As a young child I discovered my father's small collection of the world's most well-known newspaper, The New York Times, with some editions dating as far back as the mid-1960s. At first, it seemed a bit peculiar to me that someone would want to keep heaps of paper lying around that had no purpose other than to simply take up space; but as I grew older, I came to a realization that would change my life. I began to appreciate these "heaps of paper" as pieces of history that I would never have the opportunity of experiencing first-hand. As cliché as it sounds, I knew from that moment on that it was my destiny to be a part of something that was so simple, yet so innovative at the same time. And I don't know any place more capable of allowing me the opportunity to carry out my goals better than the NYU campus in New York City.

Prompt: What intrigues you? Tell us about one work of art, scientific achievement, piece of literature, method of communication, or place in the world (a film, book, performance, website, event, location, etc.), and explain its significance to you.

From fifty-story steel buildings that shoot up into the clear blue sky, to a tiny beetle that struggles to carry a single grain of rice to his make-shift shelter, I'm intrigued by every detail that life has to offer, no matter how significant or minuscule. However, the facets in life that allure my curiosity the most are perhaps those that hit closer to home. Written by one of the most influential people to have ever graced the music industry, the song Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen represents every aspect of who I am. Bohemian Rhapsody is one of the few songs that don't contain a chorus, instead consisting of three main parts: a ballad segment, an operatic passage, and a hard rock section. To a majority of others, I appear to be a simple, one-dimensional character with little versatility. But to myself and those who know me best, I am a melting pot of different personalities. A part of me is quiet and reserved, like the gentle, melodic sounds of a single person tapping against the keys of a grand piano. The other side of me is unpredictable and difficult to keep track of, like the rapid series of rhythmic and harmonic changes that introduce the pseudo-operatic midsection of the musical composition. Yet, I can be opinionated and untamed with no boundaries, similar to the harsh, aggressive tones of the heavy metal guitar riffs throughout the hard rock interlude. As one of the most intriguing works of art, Bohemian Rhapsody is truly the musical manifestation of who I am today.

Thank you so much in advance :)
shs1123 2 / 7  
Dec 29, 2011   #2
For the first essay-Very creative, fluid, organized, and mature. I would suggest adding something specific from NYU that really stands out to you. For the third essay, you suppose chose a specific event instead of everything? but i guess it differs from perspective to perspective
OP hanakml 2 / 19  
Dec 29, 2011   #3
I don't understand what you mean about my third essay? could you elaborate a little bit more please? and is there anything about the second essay that you think needs work?
shs1123 2 / 7  
Dec 29, 2011   #4
sorry, I meant to say was- is there a way in which you could somehow incorporate the bohemian rhapsody lyrics in the third paragraph? That way, a reader unfamiliar with song, (myself haha), can have a better background before interpreting the rest of the essay. I did not see any problems with your second essay, its stellar in my opinion!
OP hanakml 2 / 19  
Dec 29, 2011   #5
I've already hit the character limit on the 3rd so I can't really add anything to it, but I appreciate the feedback! Thank you for your time!
OP hanakml 2 / 19  
Dec 30, 2011   #6
bumping again. Hate to do it, but deadline's coming up and I'd love some more feedback! :)
bcblue 1 / 4  
Dec 30, 2011   #7
Second Essay:
It's really good but in my opinion I think you should talk more about some specific elements of the college that appeal to you. It asks you how you want to EXPLORE your major AT NYU'S CAMPUS. The things you mentioned could be explored from any university in New York, you should include something that is unique to the college and its programs.

Third Essay:
I agree with the previous posts, it's very well written but a bit confusing since I don't know the lyrics to the song either. You may need to sacrifice some other parts in order to improve the clarity!
gotpho 4 / 19  
Dec 30, 2011   #8
As a student at NYU, I would be able to further expose myself to fresh, new methods of thinking and viewing the world, while also bringing forth my own without the restraint of others.

If possible, I think you should elaborate on how NYU would allow you to do this.

Second and third essays seem perfect to me! You are obviously talented in your writing, so it came as no surprise that you are interested in journalism. Your personality comes out very strong, your ability to think outside the box is phenomenal. The Bohemian Rhapsody analogy really demonstrates your creativity.

I think you will be a very strong candidate for NYU admissions. Without a doubt, NYU will love reading your supplements as much as I have. Good luck with your application!
rrolle 3 / 8  
Dec 30, 2011   #9
All of them are pretty much perfect. If there's any grammatical errors, I couldn't catch them reading through it. The admissions directors aren't going to analyze it that intensely so you should be fine.

The last essay seems fine to me. Maybe it's because I know the song? No clue.
I don't think the reader needs the lyrics to know that you're comparing yourself to the song, however.
OP hanakml 2 / 19  
Dec 30, 2011   #10
A massive thanks to all of you! I'll be sure to consider all of the feedback.


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