please critique my university of richmond suuplement essay and be brutally honest thanks.
"Today you truly begin life," my dad lightly whispered to me as he left me at the school gate in the hands of a complete stranger.This was my first day of high school.My face evidenced the struggle between anxiety and excitement but the events of the next few weeks taught me that leaving your comfort zone is an oppurtunity in disguise.
I was quckly shown what would be my home for the next four years.My mind raced as i witnessed the hustle and bustle of a normal school day at Alliance High School;students running across halls,carrying books,others still playing in the fields ,teachers bellowing at some for being late for class and prefects streamlining everyone who was out of place.As i was taken to my dormroom i felt overwhelmed by the number of buildings the school has and missed my primary school that was a few feet away from my home.My student guide gave me a small notebook that contained every detail of my new school past and present.I was somehow supposed to absorb all this in less than three weeks after which every form 1 pupil was to take a test to prove their knowledge of the school and be officially intergrated into the school.Only then did i realize that every form 1 student did not wear a tie. "Its called a tie test,"said my student guide as his face cracked into an apologetic grin noticing my confusion."Every form one who passes the tie test will be given the school tie and those that fail have to reseat the test after one month during which period they walk around without ties."I swallowed hard as i tried to imagine myself among the unfortunate few who fail the test.My student guide whose name i later found out was Dennis excused himself as he was late for a club meeting and told me to ask for form 1A where i was to do my registration.With anxiety in one hand and confusion on the other i tried to trace the class by myself and found myself back in my dormroom after half an hour of futile effort.
I plucked my courage and decided to inquire about the whereabout of the elusive form1A class and was pleasantly surprised to find the senior students very helpful and kind.Horror stories i had heard of form 1 students forced to do sit ups in the middle of the night to toughen them up gradually left my mind as i was guided to my class.However my comfort was shortlived as i had to stand infront of a class of nearly fifty students to introduce myself.After that tormenting ordeal i made a few friends and somewhat lightened up.Thereafter we were led to the dinning hall where i had my first high school meal,what seamed like a mixture of maize and beans floating around in hot steaming soup.I hardly ate anything as my mind rushed to the delicious rice and stew my mum usually cooked for me back home.We were then led to the evenning parade where the school staff welcomed the new students to the school.The school choir led the whole school in singing the school anthem.There was song in every heart,cheerfulness in every face and pride in every soul;save for the form 1 students who moved their lips haphazardly fearing being dubbed unpatriotic to the school while on the contrary they had not learnt the words yet.
The whole experience taught me so many things.I realized that new surroundings out of our comfort zone are inevitable as we grow up.Living beings are drawn to other living beings and from the first moments my heart made friends with such boys as were to be my lifelong friends and participated in such activities as i was to develop a passion for served to debunk my previous misgivings.That experience served to prepare me for a life full of changing instances and emotions.I learnt that a new environment is not a stumbling block but a stepping stone to better one's life.As such i took advantage of every opportunity that high school had to offer and developed in 'body,mind and spirit.'As were the final words of my school anthem.
"Today you truly begin life," my dad lightly whispered to me as he left me at the school gate in the hands of a complete stranger.This was my first day of high school.My face evidenced the struggle between anxiety and excitement but the events of the next few weeks taught me that leaving your comfort zone is an oppurtunity in disguise.
I was quckly shown what would be my home for the next four years.My mind raced as i witnessed the hustle and bustle of a normal school day at Alliance High School;students running across halls,carrying books,others still playing in the fields ,teachers bellowing at some for being late for class and prefects streamlining everyone who was out of place.As i was taken to my dormroom i felt overwhelmed by the number of buildings the school has and missed my primary school that was a few feet away from my home.My student guide gave me a small notebook that contained every detail of my new school past and present.I was somehow supposed to absorb all this in less than three weeks after which every form 1 pupil was to take a test to prove their knowledge of the school and be officially intergrated into the school.Only then did i realize that every form 1 student did not wear a tie. "Its called a tie test,"said my student guide as his face cracked into an apologetic grin noticing my confusion."Every form one who passes the tie test will be given the school tie and those that fail have to reseat the test after one month during which period they walk around without ties."I swallowed hard as i tried to imagine myself among the unfortunate few who fail the test.My student guide whose name i later found out was Dennis excused himself as he was late for a club meeting and told me to ask for form 1A where i was to do my registration.With anxiety in one hand and confusion on the other i tried to trace the class by myself and found myself back in my dormroom after half an hour of futile effort.
I plucked my courage and decided to inquire about the whereabout of the elusive form1A class and was pleasantly surprised to find the senior students very helpful and kind.Horror stories i had heard of form 1 students forced to do sit ups in the middle of the night to toughen them up gradually left my mind as i was guided to my class.However my comfort was shortlived as i had to stand infront of a class of nearly fifty students to introduce myself.After that tormenting ordeal i made a few friends and somewhat lightened up.Thereafter we were led to the dinning hall where i had my first high school meal,what seamed like a mixture of maize and beans floating around in hot steaming soup.I hardly ate anything as my mind rushed to the delicious rice and stew my mum usually cooked for me back home.We were then led to the evenning parade where the school staff welcomed the new students to the school.The school choir led the whole school in singing the school anthem.There was song in every heart,cheerfulness in every face and pride in every soul;save for the form 1 students who moved their lips haphazardly fearing being dubbed unpatriotic to the school while on the contrary they had not learnt the words yet.
The whole experience taught me so many things.I realized that new surroundings out of our comfort zone are inevitable as we grow up.Living beings are drawn to other living beings and from the first moments my heart made friends with such boys as were to be my lifelong friends and participated in such activities as i was to develop a passion for served to debunk my previous misgivings.That experience served to prepare me for a life full of changing instances and emotions.I learnt that a new environment is not a stumbling block but a stepping stone to better one's life.As such i took advantage of every opportunity that high school had to offer and developed in 'body,mind and spirit.'As were the final words of my school anthem.
