NYU is global, urban, inspired, smart, connected, and bold. What can NYU offer you and vice versa?

NYU is global, urban, inspired, smart, connected, and bold. What can NYU offer you, and what can you offer NYU? (200-400 words)

As an ordinary student from a Chinese salaried group family, I think what I lack most is the experience and the field of vision. Due to the reasons such as economic and my school work, the opportunities for me to broaden my horizon are becoming less and less. So I hope that NYU can provide me with more opportunities to see the world, understand the difference between cultures, in order to improve my personal comprehensive quality. What's more, I want to contact with young people from different cultural backgrounds through this platform, communicating with them to expand my social network. Finally, I wish the NYU can provide useful knowledge for the future life for me, not just for a diploma. My objective is to learn what I'm interested in, which is my lifelong pursuit, and I don't want to do something useless.

Also, as a Chinese student, 12 years hard study made me develop an ability to bear hardships and stand hard work. I can deliver the positive energy to the surrounding people by my words and actions. Sharing the happiness with people around, making each day more meaningful. At the same time, I will try my best to organize or assist each activity for ourselves to make students realize the real happiness in them. Finally, I have a dream of donating a new school building to my university with my own efforts within years later, through which I want to express my gratitude and encourage students to study hard.

Song, this is a very weak essay. There is nothing in the essay that tells me that you have given great consideration to the academic offering and potential that NYU students normally aspire to be influence by and achieve. You have spent too much of the discussion on the social aspect of your expectations at NYU. While you should definitely include a social discussion in your essay, you should be concentrating more on the academic aspect of NYU and what it has to offer you. Surely there are academic programs and training opportunities that you hope to participate in as a stepping stone towards your goal of academic excellence. Don't forget that you are going to college not to socialize, but to prepare a better future for yourself. An academic discussion is sorely lacking in your essay. Please make sure to represent that aspect strongly by indicating how the university can help you achieve your goals through their various offerings. After that, you can solidly develop and discuss what you have to offer the university in terms of academic and social skills.

Hi! I am also a Chinese student applying to NYU Shanghai. As I searched their website, I couldn't find much information about their academic programs.( I only found syllabus they provided) So should I simply put on what I want to learn in the future or should I write something else?

Hi Dixing, I'll be more than happy to advise you about the proper approach to your essay if you start your own thread at this forum. Please remember to include the prompt you are trying to answer with a draft version of your essay for review. Remind me of your concerns about the essay prompt in that thread as well. Unfortunately, it would be improper for us to hijack Song's thread for your concerns. It might confuse him/her and muddle the reception of the advice I am offering him/her. I hope you understand :-) Thanks. I look forward to reading your work.

I agree that this is a weak essay. It may have to do with English being your second language, but the grammar issues make it very hard to read and to understand the point you're trying to put across. Your reasons are also very broad and not specific to NYU. I think your essay can get stronger if you provide some specificity. Good luck!

Hi! I just put my essay on the forum and I am sorry for time lag. XD But I think what Song writes is typically Chinese, my original approach is similar. I don't really understand what do you mean by


I mean I don't know what academic offerings NYU provides, but the university is famous and I just simply wanted to enter.
By the way, my academic ability is measured under the system of Chinese University Entrance Exam. The English writing in the exam is formulatic with limited vocabulary. So sorry again for my poor English. And thank you for your help!