"Odysseus's Journey Home" - Why Brown?

Please tell us more about your interest in Brown: Why does Brown appeal to you as a college option? Who or what has influenced your decision to apply?

A few months ago, a Brown admissions officer made a ceremonious visit to my high school. She likened the Brown education to Odysseus' monolithic and tortuous journey home to Ithaca. Hearing this, every checkbox for my ideal university was ticked. With Brown's lack of core curriculum, I can design my very own meandering academic adventure. At Brown, the education I receive does not end with a diploma, but with a blossomed and mature character like Odysseus' after his eventful journey home. In addition, Brown students are not pedants; they are intellects with panache and flair, who engage in interests outside of academics. Perfect examples include Brown's "International Ambassadorship Program" which aims to increase the socioeconomic diversity of Brown, the "Spring Weekend" concerts which have drawn classic acts like Elvis Costello and Ella Fitzgerald in the past, and some other lighthearted acts such as rubbing the statue of John Hay for good luck and Brown Band's anachronistic yet euphonic performance of Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit".

Nice...just make sure you are clear...write as if your audience has no idea what your are writing about.

I have a deep-rooted fascination of certain musicians such as Pink Floyd and The Beach Boys, and Romantic poets such as John Keats, all of whom have influenced my perception of the world.

==> Don't write general. I think it is better to write how they influence you, in what ways?