Hey, I was wondering if anyone was willing to help edit my supplement for Boston University. Any feedback is great! Thanks!
Short Essay: In five or six sentences, tell us how you first became interested in BU and what steps you have taken to learn more about us.
The first time I had heard about BU was at my school. I saw the list of graduates, and where they would attend college in the fall of 2010, and I stumbled across a student who was going to be attending Boston University. From there, I started researching about BU primarily online. When I discovered that Boston had an amazing study abroad and history program, I knew that I had to apply. I wanted to apply to schools that had both an exceptional history and study abroad program, something Boston University has accomplished. Unfortunately, I have not had the chance to actually visit Boston, but I have become quite familiar with the website. I think I have almost read every article and viewed every video on the BU website. As I read more about Boston University, it only made me want to attend even more.
Essay #1: Given what you know about Boston University, what do you hope to accomplish as an undergraduate here? Please respond in an essay of no more than 500 words.
While at Boston as an undergraduate student, I hope to not only further my studies in history and political science but more importantly, learn about myself and grow into an individual person.
As an undergraduate student at Boston University, I hope to take advantage of the opportunities both at Boston University, and the city of Boston. Boston University's history program in the college of arts and sciences really stood out to me as a place where I would not only learn about history through lectures, but also through seminars, discussions and field trips. Upon browsing through the courses offered at BU, one course caught my eye. The class about the economic history of the United States stuck out as something I knew I wanted to take while at Boston University. Ever since the eighth grade, I had been fascinated with American history. Something about learning about the great depression and the emergence of the United States as a world power had always intrigued me. By junior or senior year, I hope to take advantage of the Washington DC internship program. There, I will be able to put my experience and knowledge from my courses to good use. Because I plan to major in history and minor in political science, I will be able to satisfy my political science interest through interning, while also fulfilling my primary interest in history. I love the idea of being able to spend one semester in Washington DC meeting with officials, and exploring the city while learning more about American history.
Aside from academics, one of my main goals while at Boston University is to grow and develop into an individual person. Boston University allows me to meet new people and explore new experiences. Growing up in the city name, I have been primarily exposed to the same culture, and people. Boston University would allow me to meet people from all parts of the world, with different walks of life. I want to get out of my comfort zone, and be able to view the east coast in a different light. With so many on campus clubs, I am able to try new things I would not have been able to try in other schools. The Bee Keepers Club and the Foods of the Worlds clubs are just some of the clubs that caught my eye. And last but not least, I would love to try the famed "West Campus" burger.
By meeting new people and trying new things, I am able to learn who I truly am, and grow into and individual person.
I think the last sentence is almost repetitious, so you might as well want to get rid of it. That tightens up the ending better. Also, in saying "Something about learning about the great depression and the emergence of the United States as a world power had always intrigued me," it might be beneficial to point out some of the interesting aspects you think about independence and emergence of standard oil or technological giant like Microsoft that shaped the U.S.
