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Parasailing accident- commonapp essay



l3goals12 7 / 18  
Dec 23, 2009   #1
Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you.

The sun was shining, a cool wind was blowing and I was lying on the beach, sipping a drink. Around me people were playing beach-volley, swimming and just messing around. The scenery was heavenly. I was having the time of my life with my friends. At that moment all I wished for this moment to go on endlessly.

So I was very annoyed when a man came in front of me blocking my sight. He asked my friends and me if we wanted to go parasailing. I told him I was not interested and fell back in my procrastinating habits.

"Are you scared he asked," he asked.
Needless to say that my friends started ooh-ing, aah-ing and teasing me. The stranger had touched a sore spot; my pride. He had already broken the charm of the moment, so I figured out that I could as well try parasailing for the first time of my life.

I followed Jim, the stranger, to his speedboat. He fitted me with a harness a rider support attached to a parachute and the boat. He then explained the safety procedures and told me that my maneuvering abilities would not be called upon during the ride.

He ignited his engines. The beast roared under the deck. But as soon as we gained speed I started my ascension and the noise of the engines died out among the sound of the crashing waves. Soon all I could hear was the wind whipping around my head. 100 meters below me the beach line with its shops, restaurants and ice-cream vans had become a flurry of color and indistinct forms. However from my height I could clearly make out seagulls and kingfishers circling around banks of fish. I suppose that is what is called a bird's eye view.

But what I enjoyed the most was not the panoramic view; it was the rush of blood to the head that the acceleration of the boat provided. It is the same feeling as when one is accelerating in a car. However up in the air I did not have to worry about passer-bys and speed limits. I was on the right side of law and totally safe or at least that was what I thought...

While I was in ecstasy on my perch I heard a sharp slashing sound. A line holding my harness to the parachute had snapped...followed by a few others. One side of the parachute immediately collapsed and I started falling. Slowly at first, then more rapidly, as the parachute collapsed completely. I watched on helplessly as I hurtled towards the big blue.

Falling on water from my height was akin to falling from a four storey building on cement. The splash must have been as spectacular as it was painful but I cannot remember it. I suppose I must have blacked out the moment I made contact with the water, as I woke up in a hospital bed with my last memory being a blue patch. Fortunately I only suffered from a mild concussion and a broken arm. Once my parents came to the hospital the pain was only a very distant memory drowned in a sea of reproach and lectures.

Despite the little snag with the equipment, I remember this day as the most exciting in my whole life. I enjoyed every minute of the ride. The next time I go parasailing I shall go twice as high even if that means I will have twice as much broken limbs. But it does not matter as I simply love this sport.

Can I get a review please. Be as harsh as possible.

EF_Susan - / 2310  
Dec 25, 2009   #2
Thank you for the help you've been giving others with their essays! I really like the way you write;
The splash must have been as spectacular as it was painful but I cannot remember it.
At that moment all I wished was for this moment to go on endlessly.

I told him I was not interested and fell back in my procrastinating way .

"Are you scared?" he asked.

He then explained the safety procedures and told me that my maneuvering abilities would not be called upon during the ride.This is great writing.

...was akin to falling from a four story building onto cement.

...twice as high, even if that means I will have twice as many broken limbs.
OP l3goals12 7 / 18  
Dec 28, 2009   #3
Thanks a lot for the review. I was having trouble deciding which esssay to use for the commonapp but I think I'll go with that one.


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