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"parent's childhood environment" - Rutgers Essay: A Vibrant Community



RUserious 1 / -  
Feb 27, 2011   #1
Hi, this essay is due tomorrow. Probably should not have waited so long but I wanted to make it the best I could before consulting outside help.

Rutgers University is a vibrant community of people with a wide variety of backgrounds and experiences. How would you benefit from and contribute to such an environment? Consider variables such as your talents, travels, leadership activities, volunteer services, and cultural experiences. Only personal essays submitted via our website will be considered. You may enter a maximum of 3800 characters including spaces.

I never wondered what my parent's childhood environment was like until I became aware of my own. My question to them surfaced when one of my elementary school teachers spoke to my class about how the environment I was living in was far from the medium; my surrounding area being extremely diverse both racially and culturally. My mother responded that the first time she saw an African American was her first trip to Chicago as a child. Her mother had to silence her because she wanted to blurt out what she was thinking just like any child does. She was naturally ignorant of race variety because of her environment where as I was naturally ignorant of a place without race variety. If the purpose of teaching History is to advance the future than all the time spent teaching civil rights was a waste for me. This goes beyond the dream Martin Luther King Junior conveyed because the youth are not only tolerant but ignorant of the intolerance. I believe that when tolerance is second nature, it leads to a boost in expression and non-conformity. This attitude is what represents the perfect member of a vibrant community and why I believe I would benefit from and contribute to the Rutgers environment.

mintchoco 4 / 8  
Mar 1, 2011   #2
i think you shared some personal experiences from your mom, yet it's a little weak to connect those to the influence on you. If you still have time, maybe try to think about how to make the connection more stronger. Hope this helps.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Mar 7, 2011   #3
Hi, I hope you have a lot of success with it, and I'm sorry you only got one response in time!

I never wondered what my parent's parents' childhood environment was like until I became ...

...was far from the medium ?? Do you mean far from the "mean" (i.e. average); my surrounding area being extremely diverse both racially and culturally.

My mother responded that the first time she saw ...

I like your ideas, but you did not really give any specific examples of how you would benefit and contribute. In this kind of essay, they want to see if you have goals and plans.

Also, if possible, next time you should try to break it up into a few paragraphs.

:-)


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