Unanswered [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width   Posts: 3


'Pashtoon family' - Personal Background and Professional Experience



Malik Achakzai 3 / 9  
Nov 28, 2012   #1
If you could have a check on my personal background and professional experience, would be nice getting your remarks.

In 1984 on July 6th I opened my eyes in a Pashtoon family, living in the city of Chaman district Killa Abdullah Khan, Balochistan next to a gate on boundary line between Pakistan and Afghanistan. After attending my primary schooling in Primary School Chaman, later went to New Government High school Khairojan Baghicha [garden] and in 2002 I did my matriculation and took admission in Government Degree College Chaman as a regular student of Pre-medical. At the time joining my premedical classes, Pashtoonkhwa Students Organization the student political wing of Pashtoonkhwa Milli Awami Party [a Pashtoon Nationalist Party] that is struggling for democracy, national equity, social justice, fundamental human rights [specially gender equality, rights to education, health and employment], peace, stability and depending the sovereignty of Afghanistan, anti to the conservative so called religious politics and the role of Pakistani spy agencies in creation of complex formation of terrorism and extremism.

My involvement in student politics took ten years, while I participated and actively took part in political struggle of Pashtoonkhwa Milli Awami Party for the implementation of the manifestos, during the one decade period I took my position as college unit secretary, then district Killa Abdullah secretary of the organization, University of Balochistan secretary, District Quetta [well known by Quetta shora] secretary. Beside the central committee member of the student wing, soon I got a promotion to Party press secretariat and have been working there for last five years, I also did my graduation as bachelor in science and double masters, first in Biochemistry the second in Mass Communication from the department of media and journalism at University of Balochistan. Being on different posts of Organization and Party, I played my role in recruiting students and youth for party politics, campaigning for our manifesto implementation, as an adviser; taking part in local bodies, provincial and national elections, being assistant to party chairman in the field of media and international relations, did my job as international coordinator, press and information committee member of Party.

Even, it is hard for a progressive and Democratic Party's activist and political worker to do dual duties at a time, but I did and manage to do so. In 2010 I started reporting as a freelancer for Voice of America Ashna (Pashto) radio service, covered the controversial province of Balochistan; about 100 live reports of mine were on aired. I am a contributing writer to many organizations, one of them is policymic a New York based organization for media, democracy of new generation; they have published my several articles on different issues, most of them about the war on terror and Afghanistan Pakistan ties, Pakistani spy agencies role in Politics and creation of terrorism.

Living in a country, where target killing, bomb blasts, sectarian violence, ethnic violence, religious extremism, terrorism are on their peaks was a very confusing decision for me; slowly I got familiar with all risks and have felt security threats during my political activities, journalism job and research work.

dumi 1 / 6793  
Nov 29, 2012   #2
After attending my primary schooling in Primary School Chaman, I later went to New Government High school Khairojan Baghicha [garden] and in 2002 I did my matriculation and took admission in Government Degree College Chaman as a regular student of Pre-medical.

I feel as if your sentences are a bit too long. Might be a better idea to break them into smaller parts. For example:
After attending my primary schooling in Primary School Chaman, I joined New Government High School Khairojan Baghicha [garden]. After succeeding my matriculation examination in 2002, I enrolled with Government Degree College Chaman as a regular student of Pre-medical.

At the time joining my premedical classes, Pashtoonkhwa Students Organization the student political wing of Pashtoonkhwa Milli Awami Party [a Pashtoon Nationalist Party] that is struggling for democracy, national equity, social justice, fundamental human rights [specially gender equality, rights to education, health and employment], peace, stability and depending the sovereignty of Afghanistan, anti to the conservative so called religious politics and the role of Pakistani spy agencies in creation of complex formation of terrorism and extremism.

....This is another very lengthy statement. It's difficult to understand what you're trying to convey. Better rephrase this sentence.
OP Malik Achakzai 3 / 9  
Nov 29, 2012   #3
Dumi Thank you very much, I will keep my sentences shorter.


Home / Undergraduate / 'Pashtoon family' - Personal Background and Professional Experience
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳