I wrote this essay for a slightly different prompt, but I'm wondering if it would still work for the 1st UC prompt, because it describes my dreams and aspirations. Can you give any suggestions, as well as if its an appropriate response to the topic?
Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations
"5 minutes remaining." As the proctor announced the remaining time, I flipped to the blank questions on my test. A blanket of anxiety suffocated my thought process; I stumbled on even the simplest arithmetic. I felt frozen to my desk, unable to answer the remaining problems. After a few incomprehensible scribbles, I solved one of them.
"1 minute remaining."
The pencil danced in my hand as I quickly jotted down random numbers for the unsolved problems. My heart was pounding, and my hands were trembling.
"Time's up. Put your pencils down."
A feeling of relief washed over me. Finally, I was done with my test! This, however, was no ordinary test; I just finished the sprint round for Mathcounts, a middle school math competition.
Although I only thought of math as a fun hobby when I attended my school's Mathcounts practice sessions, it started to grow in me as a passion. When I heard of the American Mathematics Competition in high school, I decided to take the test. I failed miserably, but I learned about many other branches of math I have never heard of, such as number theory and combinatorics. My interest in math grew tremendously, and I created a plan to study as much as I could to do well on the test the next year. I studied over 20 hours a week, practicing past competition problems and perusing textbooks each evening until midnight. When I sat down to take the test the following year, I did better, and got into the second level of competition, the American Invitational Mathematics Exam, but I still did worse than I expected.
At first, I was devastated. After a year of studying relentlessly, I felt all that had gone to waste. At the math circle that I attended in Long Beach, there were students younger than me who were much more proficient at math competitions. What was the point of competing? After a few days however, I was struck with an epiphany; regardless of my performance, I improved my problem solving abilities and learned a lot more math than before. Also, I noticed how this affected other parts of my life. School work seemed a lot easier, and physics concepts came to me much more naturally. Now, I'm actually happy that I didn't do as well on the test, because it helped me reflect upon my life and realize there is more to math and problem solving than competitions.
As my fun little hobby for Mathcounts transformed into a passion for math, I have become more mature. Math is not about seeing who is the smartest or the best. It's about personal growth and developing analytical abilities. I also hope to become a mathematician to continue my passion.
Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations
"5 minutes remaining." As the proctor announced the remaining time, I flipped to the blank questions on my test. A blanket of anxiety suffocated my thought process; I stumbled on even the simplest arithmetic. I felt frozen to my desk, unable to answer the remaining problems. After a few incomprehensible scribbles, I solved one of them.
"1 minute remaining."
The pencil danced in my hand as I quickly jotted down random numbers for the unsolved problems. My heart was pounding, and my hands were trembling.
"Time's up. Put your pencils down."
A feeling of relief washed over me. Finally, I was done with my test! This, however, was no ordinary test; I just finished the sprint round for Mathcounts, a middle school math competition.
Although I only thought of math as a fun hobby when I attended my school's Mathcounts practice sessions, it started to grow in me as a passion. When I heard of the American Mathematics Competition in high school, I decided to take the test. I failed miserably, but I learned about many other branches of math I have never heard of, such as number theory and combinatorics. My interest in math grew tremendously, and I created a plan to study as much as I could to do well on the test the next year. I studied over 20 hours a week, practicing past competition problems and perusing textbooks each evening until midnight. When I sat down to take the test the following year, I did better, and got into the second level of competition, the American Invitational Mathematics Exam, but I still did worse than I expected.
At first, I was devastated. After a year of studying relentlessly, I felt all that had gone to waste. At the math circle that I attended in Long Beach, there were students younger than me who were much more proficient at math competitions. What was the point of competing? After a few days however, I was struck with an epiphany; regardless of my performance, I improved my problem solving abilities and learned a lot more math than before. Also, I noticed how this affected other parts of my life. School work seemed a lot easier, and physics concepts came to me much more naturally. Now, I'm actually happy that I didn't do as well on the test, because it helped me reflect upon my life and realize there is more to math and problem solving than competitions.
As my fun little hobby for Mathcounts transformed into a passion for math, I have become more mature. Math is not about seeing who is the smartest or the best. It's about personal growth and developing analytical abilities. I also hope to become a mathematician to continue my passion.