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"Past, presence, and future all reside in History" - Brown - academic interest



ylee11 7 / 11  
Dec 28, 2010   #1
I appreciate any advices

When I was a little girl, I used to fall asleep in my dad's arms, as he read Greek mythology. As I aged, I especially enjoyed reading history. I found myself quickly captivated by the context of history. l was quickly assimilated to various worlds; I was thrilled at Alexander's victory and bemoaned at Caesar's fall. To me, history was an enormous fountain that I could not stop drinking from. The more I understood history, the more a panorama of images appeared in my head. Though, I felt indefinable reluctance that the rise and fall of a dynasty could be described only by few pages. The grief and joy of ones that came before us were condensed but not fully explained. My curiosities to explore this mankind more in depth started to grow gradually.

In the end, I realized history was all about a reflection of an individual - how he/she viewed the world. One could easily ignore parts he thought were needless and focused on a specific incident. I found that I was strongly intrigued by the histories that were overlooked: other accounts that might completely reverse the general understanding of the incident. Stories were descended by the winners, honoring their conquests and lionizing their heroes. I admit that history does contain some bias, even though objectivity is what historians tend to pursue. However, there is no doubt that history has been a constant motivation to the citizens of world, encouraging competitions and conquests. Everyone dreams of making their mark on history but few have achieved it. I too, desire such honor, and history will tell me which direction to take.

History itself is dynamic and fluxional. It is beautiful and ugly. It tells us that we are not completely independent from our past because it is what has formed us. Infinite possibilities of human behaviors are vividly revealed as well as humankind's repeated flaws. Past, present, and future all reside in History. How can I resist studying this charming subject that nurtured this world?

Nightwing 2 / 4  
Dec 28, 2010   #2
Hi there. Here are some mistakes I found.

As I age, I enjoyed reading, especially history

It's As I aged .

moaned by Caesar's fall

Caesar's fall is not moaning, right? Wrong use of idiom. It should be "at"

More I understand history

"More I understood history"

reflection of individual

"of an individual"

These are more conspicuous errors that I found, but I hope these help you.
Few tips though. You need to make your tenses consistent. There were some sentences where you put one verb in present tense and the other one in past tense (in later part of the sentence).

Also, I didn't feel like you put "you" in this short answer. It shows that you're interested in history, but what are you going to do about it?
OP ylee11 7 / 11  
Dec 28, 2010   #3
Thanks everyone
I've changed it according to you guys' advices. Could you take a look at it again?
I tried to express "I" but am still not sure..
rebrose 8 / 19  
Dec 29, 2010   #4
Just one thing.

bemoaned at Caesar's fall

Good Luck!


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