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A Place That Makes You Dream



brittneyakey 1 / -  
Oct 29, 2015   #1
On July 29th, 2015, I took a step into an airplane that led me to not only a different continent, but into a new outlook on life. My visit to Europe in the summer of 2015 was one of the best experiences in my life. There, I realized that I have a deep passion for travel. Additionally, I got to know myself as a person and learned about the importance of the world and different cultures.

As a child, I went on vacations with my family almost every summer. Of course, I am thankful for those opportunities, but I think in a way I took it for granted. While on these vacations, I did simple things like swim and rest; things I can easily do at home. In France, Italy, and Spain I took full advantage of my surroundings. I explored, visited small towns and shops, plus I tried new foods. While I did these things I discovered that I did not want to experience this bliss just once. I wanted to have the chance to revisit and also explore more of the world. I thought to myself, if these small towns in these huge countries hold some of the greatest things, just imagine what the rest of the world must be like!

After having this experience, I began to think about how I would achieve these goals. Of course I would need to be able to support myself when I traveled, so how would I do that? The bright idea of combining my career with travel came to mind. I considered choosing a business related major. I loved DECA business club, and I always wanted to take part in FBLA (Future Business Leaders of America). I then narrowed my major down to marketing. I could see myself as a marketing/advertising executive, and I would combine my interests by working for an international cosmetics company. My prior experience with photography and editing, combined with my love for beauty and blogging would be put to use.

Continuing my ambitious thoughts, I considered using my love for culture for community service. I dreamed of going to India to promote campaigns for confidence in individuals with dark skin, due to the glorification of fair skinned women in the country. I want to help the refugees from the Middle East in Europe, and assist the Palestinians in their fight with Israel. While doing this, I wish to visit small towns, talk to people, and learn more about the lands that I go to. Helping others is in my nature, and learning about the world while doing it will make my adventures even better.

Who would think that a school trip could conjure up huge dreams? While preparing for my trip, I never expected to plan my future, as well. I believe that the University of Maryland can help me achieve my goals as someone who wishes to pursue a career in the marketing field.

justivy03 - / 2265  
Nov 5, 2015   #2
Brittney, first of all, it would be helpful if you posted the prompt as well so that the contributors will be able to justify if you have written the essay in response to the prompt. For now, I'd like to share my thoughts on your essay.

- buthowever I think, in a way I took it for granted.
- plus I tried new foodslocal cuisine .
- While I didDoing these things I discovered
- I thought to myself, if thesethis small towns in thesethis ( remember the difference of "these" and "this" and use them appropriately in your sentences ) huge countries hold some of the greatest things,

- support myself when I traveled , so how would I do that?
- combinedcoupled with my love for beauty
- and blogging would be put to usewill definitely be useful .

- duewithto the glorification of fair skinned women in the country.
- and learn more about the lands that I go toplaces I visit .

- Who would think that a school trip could conjure up huge dreams?
- WhileP reparing for my trip, I never expected to plan my future, as well.

Brittney, the ending of your essay surprised me a lot, is this a supplement essay for UM?, well, if it is, it's not that strong, well written but needs a lot more information on the part of your academic background and goals.

Anyhow, I hope my remarks helped.


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