Hello all,
I am submitting my application to Stanford in a matter of days and would appreciate any feedback on my mini-essays. The following deals with the topic of "what matters most to you and why":
I am a very political person. This is not to say I'm a prude- I enjoy the frivolity of my teenage-ness as anyone would- but, rather, that I'm au courant with the civic affairs of my country. I find it intriguing that anyone could possibly find such important proceedings mundane; after all, it is the fate of the people that we are speaking of! Political history, in particular, I find, is extremely beneficial to my interest; specifically, I delight in learning the development of democracy. Democracy, to me, is one of the greatest man-made doctrines. It is the foundation upon which so many countries go about their rule. In Canada, where I live, we exemplify this form of government. Despite the fact that only adults can vote in democratic elections, I have found myself a leeway to get involved with politics anyway; I am a member of the federal NDP party, and, thus, am able to participate in intraparty affairs. During this, I am acquainting myself with possible future leaders. I am forging new connections to potentially alleviate myself to high political status. And yet, I arduously labour each day sans the politics I enjoy so much. Being a minor puts me at a significant disadvantage when it comes to democratic politics; in fact, this age restriction applies to most any political system. However, I find that with something as important to me as politics, I am willing to wait; this is not something easy as I am not the world's most patient person. The politics of political decision making engages me to presume that I too will one day accomplish my dream- to stand as a proud member of Parliament, and participate in the planning of political affairs. It is important because it is the very principle behind the engine which powers a country. It is important because it relies on generations of people to come together and decide how best to rule democratically. I would be proud to proclaim myself a democratic politician.
WC: 1944
I am submitting my application to Stanford in a matter of days and would appreciate any feedback on my mini-essays. The following deals with the topic of "what matters most to you and why":
I am a very political person. This is not to say I'm a prude- I enjoy the frivolity of my teenage-ness as anyone would- but, rather, that I'm au courant with the civic affairs of my country. I find it intriguing that anyone could possibly find such important proceedings mundane; after all, it is the fate of the people that we are speaking of! Political history, in particular, I find, is extremely beneficial to my interest; specifically, I delight in learning the development of democracy. Democracy, to me, is one of the greatest man-made doctrines. It is the foundation upon which so many countries go about their rule. In Canada, where I live, we exemplify this form of government. Despite the fact that only adults can vote in democratic elections, I have found myself a leeway to get involved with politics anyway; I am a member of the federal NDP party, and, thus, am able to participate in intraparty affairs. During this, I am acquainting myself with possible future leaders. I am forging new connections to potentially alleviate myself to high political status. And yet, I arduously labour each day sans the politics I enjoy so much. Being a minor puts me at a significant disadvantage when it comes to democratic politics; in fact, this age restriction applies to most any political system. However, I find that with something as important to me as politics, I am willing to wait; this is not something easy as I am not the world's most patient person. The politics of political decision making engages me to presume that I too will one day accomplish my dream- to stand as a proud member of Parliament, and participate in the planning of political affairs. It is important because it is the very principle behind the engine which powers a country. It is important because it relies on generations of people to come together and decide how best to rule democratically. I would be proud to proclaim myself a democratic politician.
WC: 1944