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I will never regard difficulties as defeats again but as opportunities to enlarge my achievements.



dreamhigh 1 / 6  
Dec 24, 2015   #1
Difficulty needs not foreshadow despair or defeat. Rather achievement can be all the more satisfying because of obstacles surmounted. (under 300) (Amherst Supplemental Essay)

Please tell me about my essay if it is a good one. Please check my grammar. I will never get tired rewriting to make my essay perfect. Thank you.

"You can't take the test since you don't have ID written in English," the instructor said. I felt as if my heart is stroked by sharp knife. If I couldn't take the November SAT test, I won't make it on time for Amherst admission. I cried out loud, "Why me?" Since as an international students, the SAT test was so difficult, not to mention my first time taking SAT and I felt like giving up, why would the unexpected event discouraged me again? For a while, I lost myself because I was tricked by the impediments.

But soon enough, I realized that difficulties were not the harbingers of despair. In fact, they were the motivators which pushed me to succeed. Because of that event, my chances to get in Amherst are getting lower, so I committed myself into admission essays and other tests. I tried more and more because I know that the success or getting accepted from Amherst will be the happiest event in my life. I got more confidence because I couldn't afford to let these difficulties knock off my feet again. I believe that in the end, I would be satiated enough depending on how challenges I faced.

To get accepted from top college like Amherst might be as difficult as to get to the top of Mt. Everest. Even if it's true, I won't give up because the more the obstacles surmounted, the more satisfying the success is. I will never regard difficulties as defeats again but as opportunities to enlarge my achievements.

stevenkaufmann1 - / 1  
Dec 24, 2015   #2
I felt as if my heart ishad been stroked by sharp knife.
If I couldn't take the November SAT test, I won'twouldn't make it onin time for Amherst admission.
I cried out loudexclaimed , "Why me?"
SinceaA s an international students, the SAT test was so difficult, not to mention it was my first timeattempt taking SAT;and I felt like giving up.W hy would thethis unexpected event discouraged me again ?

so I committed myself in to admission essays
because I know that the success or getting accepted fromto Amherst willwould be the happiest event inday of my life.
OP dreamhigh 1 / 6  
Dec 24, 2015   #3
Hey..thz for grammar. .:D. .but why u stopped? ?..so u mean my essay is good enough to submit??
doutiantian 3 / 12  
Dec 24, 2015   #4
Hi, dream high, stevenkaufmann1 has already done a good job.

In fact, they were (are ) the motivators which pushed (push) me to succeed

I tried more and more (devoted myself)because I know that the success or getting accepted from Amherst will (would) be the happiest event in my life.

I believe that in the end, I would be satiated enough depending on how challenges I faced.(I believe the challenges I faced were be fabulous wealth

for me).

Even ifit's true (even being admitted is extremely hard), I won't give up because the more the obstacles (I)surmounted, the more satisfying the success is (would be). I will never regard difficulties as defeats again but as opportunities to enlarge my achievements.
OP dreamhigh 1 / 6  
Dec 24, 2015   #5
Hey..thz you guys..I am gonna submut..


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