Unanswered [15] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 6


Rochester second short answer: diff. points of view.


kda013 6 / 18  
Dec 28, 2009   #1
Rochester students represent many different points of view. Each student constructs an independent study and research plan. Describe what you will contribute to Rochester's diversity of ideas, experiences, and identities. If you can, incorporate a positive past experience where you chose your own learning path, or a negative experience where you wanted to exercise more independence.

In sophomore year, I loved to do most activities with only one exception: science lab. Our Biology lab required each student to work with others as a group; it meant team work. In spite of my passion for Biology subject, I could not see the necessity for sharing the work and effort with others. I, who greatly stressed individuality, felt that one would do the 'real' thinking process and the rest would get the same credit for what they did not work for. Although I understood the value of group activity, sharing the amount of work did not bring any feeling of achievement. However in some rare occasions, some group comprised people who were actually unique and each had something to contribute. I believe such people are Rochester students. With my talents and enthusiasm in the field of my interest, I will contribute to the Meliora: Ever better Rochester community

the word limit should be 125 but this is 150..
i need help...

i have to admit that i'm having
difficulty answering this question..
pls. tell me if i'm being too negative in my short answer
and some advice would be nice.;]

thanks.
BlessedHands23 4 / 8  
Dec 28, 2009   #2
In my sophomore year, I loved to do most activities with only one exception: science lab. Our Biology lab required each student to work with others as a group; it meant team work (i dont think its necessary, working in a group already implies teamwork so you never had to state it). In spite of my passion for Biology subject, I could not see the necessity for sharing the work and effort with others. I, who greatly stressed individuality, felt that one would do the 'real' thinking process and the rest would get the same credit for what they did not work for. Although I understood the value of group activity, sharing the amount of work did not bring any feeling of achievement. However in some rare occasions, some groups comprised people who were actually unique and each had something to contribute. I believe such people are Rochester students. With my talents and enthusiasm in the field of my interest, I will contribute to the Meliora: Ever better Rochester community.

Otherwise i cant help you cut down the word limit...nothing is coming to mind but its good nonetheless
ace 5 / 66 5  
Dec 28, 2009   #3
You could remove the last line...i feel that once you have said 'I believe such people are Rochester students' is good enough it left me feeling like you KNOW what you are and heading!

OR
I believe such people are Rochester students. With my talents and enthusiasm in Biology, I will contribute to the Meliora: Ever better Rochester community
OP kda013 6 / 18  
Dec 28, 2009   #4
thanks BlessedHands23 and ace!!

hopefully i'll send it today ;]
BlessedHands23 4 / 8  
Dec 28, 2009   #5
Ur welcome and I wish you all the best in your college applications
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jan 3, 2010   #6
Despite my passion for Bi ology, subject I could not see the necessity of sharing the work and effort with others. I, who greatly stressed individuality, felt that one would do the 'real' thinking process and the rest would get the same credit. for what they did not work for . Although I understood the value of group activity, sharing the amount of work did not bring any feeling of achievement. However in some rare occasions, some groups were comprised of people who were actually unique and each had something to contribute.-----> this sounds like you are very judgmental.

Perhaps instead you should say:
Sometimes, when a challenge is very difficult, the real collective potential of everyone in a group can come up as we all rise to the occasion.


Home / Undergraduate / Rochester second short answer: diff. points of view.
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳